


the heart is just a muscle (right?)

by gaypanic



Category: Once Upon a Time (TV)
Genre: Alternate Universe, F/F, Fluff and Angst, Minor Character Death, Plane Crash AU, Swan Queen endgame, fighting for survival au, lost in the mountains au, lots of tropes, stranded in the middle of nowhere au, the dog lives i'm not a monster oKAY lmao
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2018-05-03
Updated: 2018-05-03
Packaged: 2019-05-01 17:35:20
Rating: Mature
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 8
Words: 33,283
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/14525751
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/gaypanic/pseuds/gaypanic
Summary: “Emma, what the hell were you thinking?” She sounds more concerned than angry, though the blonde can tell both emotions are there.Emma shrugs. “I was worried,” she answers, theabout youleft implied.“You’re an idiot.”“What?” Emma frowns, looking at Regina as the other woman makes her way to a standing position, arm outstretched to help Emma up. “Why?”“You just are.”[stranded in the mountains au]





	1. Chapter 1

**Author's Note:**

  * For [coffeesometime](https://archiveofourown.org/users/coffeesometime/gifts).



> this is the first of my promised zimbio fics! THIS IS FOR YOU EVIE. I hope you like it omg. I loved writing this sO MUCH, and hopefully it isn’t too similar to the movie because it was used as heavy inspiration, and there were a lot of sq af things I couldn’t let go of. (inspired by The Mountain Between Us)
> 
> (congrats forever to SQ for winning zimbio and all of swen for making it happen) 
> 
> fun fact: the first three chapters were written in an airport or on a plane, including That One Part because I’m insane like that.

Emma really didn’t think a little bit of snow would affect the flight back, but as it turns out, there isn’t just a little bit of snow, it’s a whole storm. Her next thought is that a delay won’t be so bad, so long as it isn’t overnight, but as _that_ turns out, the whole flight back is cancelled until further notice.

On any other day, she wouldn’t mind waiting for another flight. She could always find something else to do in the city, something else to photograph, but this time she has somewhere to be. It’s not as if she can delay her own wedding.

She paces in the airport before sitting down and trying to work through her growing anxiety, trying to find the source of it all. She isn’t worried about missing the wedding so much as she is about her fiancé’s reaction to missing it, so when she chooses her first plan of action, letting someone know what’s happening on her end, she decides to call her mother instead of him.

The phone rings once, and that’s all it takes for Mary Margaret to answer, go figure. “Hey, Mom,” Emma says with caution, nervous for the woman’s response. She _knows_ her mom. She’s going to tell Emma that it’s fine, that _she’s_ fine, but the letdown in her voice will be undeniable.

“Oh my god, sweetie! I’m so happy to hear from you you! What time does your flight leave again? Are you excited? Nervous? It’s okay if you are! It’s--”

“Mom, please,” Emma says, trying to sound gentle, but it cuts off too harsh so she mutters a quick, “I’m sorry” before breaking the news. “Uh, so the flight was cancelled.”

There’s a long, stagnant pause where Mary Margaret says nothing, and neither does Emma because she doesn’t want to feed her mother too much information up front so long as there isn’t a definite solution. If she remained vague enough, it would give her mom the right idea. That the situation isn’t settled, but it also isn’t _impossible_.

“Oh,” the woman says in surprise. “Well…” and Emma can almost hear the worry in her voice as she tries to fix the problem herself, thousands of miles away.

“It’s fine, Mom. I’m gonna make it, okay?” Emma gives a nervous laugh. “I mean, who misses their own wedding.”

The mention of the wedding seems to dissipate Mary Margaret’s worries immediately. “Of course you’re going to make it. You always accomplish anything you set your mind to. I know you know that, but I needed to let you know how inspired I am by you.”

“Thanks, mom. So, uh, is Killian there?”

“He is! Do you want to speak with him?”

Emma hesitates. She _should_ , she knows she should, but there was a reason she called her mother instead of him to begin with. Both she and Killian are stubborn, unwilling to accept failure. She could figure this out on her own. She _would_ figure this out on her own. He would hear about the situation from Snow, unable to fix it himself, and he would be impressed tomorrow when Emma still showed up in time for their wedding. Besides, she didn’t want any comments from him about how she shouldn’t have left to begin with.

“No, that’s okay. I’ll talk to him when I get there.”

“Alright, sweetie. Keep me updated alright? I love you.”

“I love you too,” Emma replies before hanging up with a loud sigh. She juggles her phone in one hand, wondering if she really should just make the call. It’s just what you do before a flight, right?

She goes to his contact, about to hit the little green button before someone’s voice catches her attention. A woman at a nearby desk, insisting that she _has_ to make the flight, needing to make it back to Maine by tomorrow, same as Emma.

In seconds, the blonde has her phone back by her side, call forgotten, as she makes her way over to the woman, who groans in frustration before walking away, pacing in place as she runs a hand through her short dark hair.

“Hey,” Emma starts.

“Hey?” she responds glancing up at Emma briefly before her eyes land back on her phone, looking at it as if it’s going to provide her with some kind of miracle solution.

“You need to get to Maine by tomorrow?” The woman’s eyebrows raise, her full attention going to Emma. “I wasn’t eavesdropping, I swear.” The woman looks even more incredulous. “...on purpose. Look, I need to be in Maine by tomorrow too.”

“So? Unless there’s some kind of miracle, it looks like we aren’t going anywhere.”

The woman turns away from Emma then, and there’s not any reason Emma should help her, but she decides to anyways. Something about her draws Emma in. She tells herself it’s normal. “I can help you,” she blurts out.

The woman turns back around. “How can _you_ help?”

“I’ve got a guy.”

* * *

 

The guy is named Neal. Regina learns his name before learning Emma’s, and Emma doesn’t even learn _her_ name until they’re walking to wherever the blonde’s mystery plan is going to pan out.

“So, Neal’s a pilot,” Emma says. “We go waayyy back.”

“Boyfriend?” Regina dares to ask, but her eyes catch a glimpse of something shiny on Emma’s left hand. “Husband?” she corrects.

Emma laughs like it’s the funniest thing she’s ever heard. “ _As if_. He’s like a brother to me. We had the same foster family when we were kids.”

“Oh.” Regina’s about to ask about the person who _is_ the husband, but Emma’s already talking before she can bother.

“So what about you? What’s your story?”

“Not much to tell really.” Emma glances over her without breaking stride, her lips turning up just slightly like she knows that isn’t true. “I’m a doctor. Heart surgeon, specifically.”

Emma nods. “Is that what brought you out here? Or what’s taking you to Maine?”

“Maine is my home,” she explains, letting the subject drop.

The two of them end up in a small building with an even smaller plane. A dog sleeps on the ground but jumps up as soon as he sees Emma, running to her with an excited wag of his tail, tongue hanging out before slobbering on the blonde’s hand.

“Bug!” she shouts. “Hey boy, I see you’ve remembered me!” She crouches so that Bug can lick her face, and Regina pulls back when the dog turns to run to her. He jumps up, his paws landing against Regina’s stomach, knocking her back.

“Bug, hey,” a man calls out. Regina looks up in time to see a scruffy man half walking, half jogging to them.”Don’t terrorize the lady,... and Emma”, he adds with a laugh.

“Shut up, Neal. This is Regina. She’s in the same situation as me so I thought I could help her out. Regina, this is Neal, my pseudo pilot brother. I mean, he’s kind of my brother, but he’s definitely a pilot. And this little guy is Bug,” she says scratching behind the dog’s ears.

“I’m not sure about _little_ ,” Regina comments. “Where’d the name come from?”

“That was all Emma’s doing. I just went with it.”

“I’m sure,” Regina comments, eyeing the two suspiciously. The room falls into a silence that Regina thinks is awkward, but no one else seems fazed by.

“Okay, well,” Neal says, “I’m gonna get everything ready. We’ll load up in a little bit, okay?” He gives a small wave as he jogs over to the plane.

After another small moment of silence, Regina turns to Emma. “So, was Bug your dog? In the past?”

Emma laughs, “No, he’s always been Neal’s. But we were roommates when Bug was a puppy. There was a shelter that had too many dogs, and they were going to put them down, so we decided to rescue one. Bug had been adopted once but sent back because he was too rowdy, so he was the clear choice. I guess he was _ours_ for a month or so, but when I had to move, I couldn’t take him.”

“How long ago was that?”

“Seven years? Eight?” Emma laughs. “It’s crazy to think about that. So much has changed.”

Before Regina can comment further, Neal is waving them over, and Emma grins at her before they make their way to the plane, Bug on their heels. “Ready?” Neal asks.

Emma’s already on the plane before Regina gets a chance to wonder, “You filed a flight plan, I assume?”

Neal shakes his head, an unconcerned look on his face. “It should be fine. We won’t be in anyone’s way, and my plane just passed inspection last week, so it’s in its best shape.” At Regina’s wary expression, he hands her his pilot’s license and adds, “I do this all the time. I wouldn’t now if I wasn’t sure we’d be okay.”

She examines the license and glances back up at him, the sincerity in his eyes anything but untrustworthy. “Okay. What about the storm?”

“Off our course. You’re in good hands, Regina. I promise.”

She hesitates for a moment, which understandable, she only just met these people and she's about to out her life in one of their hands. But it's not much different than any other flight with any other pilot, and no different than the trust her patients put on her when she performs surgery.

With reason in mind, she climbs on the plane.

* * *

 

The inside of the plane is small, but not small enough that Emma ends up squished next to Regina, which is kind of too bad, but it’s likely for the best considering the glare she gets when her shoe brushes against Regina’s leg.

“Sorry,” she mumbles, but Regina only looks out the window at the passing view. Neal isn’t saying much, all his attention on the flight, and Emma only has so much phone battery, so she isn’t eager to use it all just to pass the time.

She eyes Regina carefully, waiting to see if she’ll turn back around, but when she doesn’t, Emma decides just to start up a conversation herself. “So,” she starts, watching as dark eyes turn back around to meet hers. It’s under Regina’s gaze that she realizes she isn’t sure what to say. She glances at Regina’s hands long enough to notice she doesn’t have a ring, so asking about family isn’t a good go-to. She already knows about her job so she doesn’t need to ask about that. But she ends up blurting “You’re a heart surgeon?” anyway.

Regina smirks. “Yes.” Emma doesn’t think she’s going to add anything to the conversation, but then-- “What about you?”

“I work at a gym, as a trainer. But I also do freelance photography.”

“Is that what brought you all the way out here?”

Emma nods, “Did you see the eclipse? That’s what I was photographing.”

“Ah, no. I was in surgery so, unfortunately, I didn't see it.” Emma's eyes light up, a grin spreading on her face. She's pulling her most recent prints from her bag before Regina even has a chance to ask.

The blonde unbuckles her seat belt and shifts across the plane so that she's in the seat facing Regina, leaning forward and holding the photographs out so that they’re facing the other woman. “Now you can! Well, kind of. It’s not the same, but…”

“It’s beautiful,” Regina says, offering a smile to the blonde. “You’re very talented.”

Emma beams, “Thanks. I’m sure you are too, but, well… hopefully I won’t have to find out the hard way. I think my heart’s pretty healthy.”

“I’m sure it is,” Regina says, turning to her phone. Emma leans back in her seat, only moderately bummed that the conversation has come to an end once again.

“Hey, Emma, you should probably buckle back up. We’re about to pass by the storm. It’s still a few miles over, but it could still get a little bumpy.”

“Yeah, okay,” she says, shifting back to her original seat. She takes a few pictures before tucking her camera away. She stares out the window, bored until Bug jumps up from his resting position close to Neal and walking to her, his tail wagging and tongue hanging out. “Hey, boy!” Emma says, her voice going high pitched to appease Bug’s excitement. “Do you like flying? Does Neal give you special treats for being so good?” She catches Regina side eying her so she stares back. “What…? You’re a cat person aren’t you?”

For a moment Regina looks almost offended before she says, “I don’t have any pets. But if I had one it would be a dog.”

“Yeah?”

“Yes,” Regina says, a faint smile on her face before turning back to her phone.

Emma regards her for a moment, debating on if she wants to say anything else or just give the woman her peace. She decides to do the latter, but when she leans over to see what Regina’s reading and the woman sighs loudly, it’s clear that it made no difference. “Sorry,” she shrugs, not sounding sorry at all. “I noticed you were reading and just got curious.”

“Curious as to what I was reading or how I was doing it?” she says with a dry laugh.

Emma puts her hands up, “Okay, I won’t be so nosy. There’s no need to snap at me.” Regina breathes out from her nose, turning her head away from Emma, tucking her phone away in her jacket pocket. “And I know how to read. For your information.” Emma says before she turns away too.

The plane jerks a little, and Regina grips the arm rest next to her. Emma sighs and tries to focus on the window outside. She snaps a few pictures before they have to pass the storm, but puts her camera away when she sees dark clouds looming in the distance. She glances out the front before checking out Regina’s window and sees the same.

“Hey, Neal? It kind of looks like we’re heading right for the storm, rather than around it. You know I trust you, but… what’s up with that?” Regina looks between them, her expression neutral albeit a little wary.

“The storm moved quicker than I thought it would. We still can make it around as long as it keeps moving how it is. Looks like it’s headed southbound,” he says, veering the plane left. Emma nods. Bug whines a little in front of her.

“It’s okay, boy,” she says as she gives him a comforting pet on the head, her other hand gripping his collar just in case. Next to her, Regina’s eyes are sealed shut. “Are you scared of flying?”

“No,” the brunette answers, her voice wrought with tension.

“You sound scared.”

“I’m _not_.”

“Well, you _sound_ like it.”

“I’m not scared,” Regina repeats before adding. “You’re infuriating.”

“Just trying to lighten the mood. Or distract you. Is it working?” Regina snorts. “Okay well, let me know if you have any better ideas. Otherwise, I’m just gonna--”

“Shit,” Neal suddenly mutters in interruption.

“What is it?”

“The storm. It slowed, which means we won’t make it around.”

“We can’t go above it?”

Neal shakes his head, “This is as high up as we can go. I might be able to get us through a weaker part, but it won’t be easy.”

Emma shifts in her seat and tries not to let on how nervous she is at this whole situation. “I believe in you, Neal,” she says with as much confidence as she can. The plane jerks more, the turbulence rocking the plane abruptly. Bug wines and sticks his head down between Emma’s knees. She scratches behind his ears but can’t seem to shake the bad feeling this situation is leaving her with.

Regina is stiff next to her, her hands tight on the seat as her face remains a picture of stoicism. Her breaths are slow, and Emma reaches for her hand, hoping it will help calm the woman’s nerves and that she won’t get snapped at again. Regina spares a tight smile for her just before the plane jolts again even harder.

In the cockpit, Neal is frantic as he tries to maintain the plane’s balance, but even over the engine and the wind howling past outside, Emma can hear Neal cursing between attempts to call for help over the radio.

It’s within minutes that everything goes downhill, the plane starting a nosedive towards the ground. Emma grips Bug’s collar tighter, repositioning him as best she can so he doesn’t get hurt, but she doesn’t let out a breath of relief when the plane levels back out and she doesn’t let go of Regina’s hand.

The plane dips again, shaking, and Emma can’t pinpoint the exact moment Neal loses control, but he’s suddenly shouting back at them over the noise of the chaos, instructing them on safe positions to be holding when the plane hits the ground, and Emma doesn’t want to dwell on it, but once he says _when_ instead of _if_ , she can’t think of anything else.

She feels Regina’s hand gripping hers and Bug trying to wiggle free to get to Regina’s side of the plane. Emma isn’t going to let him go anywhere, but when they hit another rough patch and she loses her grip on his collar, he slips away.

She screams when she feels the plane tipping to one side and then the other, and then again when she hears part of the plane rearing itself off from the whole thing, and she knows now that this isn’t a question of _if_ or _when_ , but _life_ and _death,_ and all she can think about now is if Bug is going to be okay or get sucked from the plane and how Regina’s hold on her is so strong that she isn’t worried about losing her, even if she could lose anything.

 _Everything_.

She could lose everything.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Ahh I know I posted this all at once, but if you want to leave comments on every chapter so I can read your reactions to everything that would be super cool! No pressure though. Either way I’m very chill so if you just scream at me or keysmash, it’s valid


	2. Chapter 2

“ _ Emma _ .”

Regina’s eyes slowly peel open, adjusting slow to the darkness around her. Her throat feels raw and her voice is so unrecognizable that she wonders if that had even been her who had spoken. 

“Emma,” she says again, identifying the voice as her own. 

She’s dizzy as she tries to sit up, but it doesn't take her long to acknowledge how lucky she is. Nothing is broken - maybe cracked, maybe sprained - but not broken, and most importantly, she’s  _ alive _ . 

The air is freezing, but the plane around them, despite it’s crashed and powerless state is sheltering enough from the wind, and she can hear it screaming outside. Everything is so dark, so there’s no telling where they are. The could be half buried in a snowdrift or on the edge of a rocky cliff, but she can’t worry about that now. All danger is immediate, but the priority right now is finding three heartbeats around her.

She pulls herself up some more until she can make her way to Emma, who’s leaning against the side of the plane closest to the ground. Her position concerns Regina, and she rushes over to feel for a pulse, wincing as she moves too quickly, forgetting about her own injuries momentarily. 

Looking for life inside Emma’s body is the longest minute of Regina’s life, and she’s filled with dread until she feels the gentle thrumming of Emma’s pulse beneath her fingers. She sighs in relief as she starts to check for any visible injuries, but sucks in another breath when she catches sight of a nasty gash in Emma’s left leg. She makes sure Emma’s readjusted before treating the wound. It’s  _ bad _ and will likely prevent her from walking for a few days, but luckily it seems to have only damaged the muscle of her calf and not much else. It may take a while to heal but it will.  _ If they make it _ , Regina fails to stop herself from thinking.

There’s a soft whine to her left, and through the dark she sees Bug looking over at them, his eyes big, sad, but somehow more hopeful than Regina feels. “Come here, boy,” she says, hoping the dog is okay enough to do so, and amazingly enough, he is. She bundles Emma up in any spare layers she finds in her luggage, settling Bug next to her for extra warmth.

She takes a heavy breath, watching it come out in a cloud in the space around them, indicating just how cold it is. It’s starting to sink into her skin, freezing her to the bone, but she has one more thing to take care of before tending to herself. Shuddering, she makes her way to the cockpit, fearing the worst, and rightfully so. It only takes seconds for her to see that Neal didn’t make it. She barely knew the man, but she lets out a sob at the lost, unsure if it’s rooted more in loss or in fear, but either way, his lifeless body has just made this entire situation more real.

It’s too dark to take care of his body now, so she turns back to the body of the plane, slipping through the tight space to layer herself up. She’ll look through everything in morning when they have light, hopefully with a conscious Emma. There’s no room for her to huddle up with the blonde and Bug, so she gets as close as she can, her head resting against Emma’s good leg, and she lets sleep take her.

* * *

 

When she wakes up, everything is quiet except for the wind beating against the outside of the plane and whistling it’s way through the open spaces. It’s brighter at least, and Regina takes a moment to take in her surroundings. Parts of the plane are damaged enough to send in the icy air, but the rest of it blocks the wind, which she’s sure would be enough to cut right through them. Any shelter is better than no shelter.

She wraps her scarf tighter around her, making sure her coat is completely done up before she slips out the door to the side, which falls open with a loud clang. She peeks back to see if the sound stirred Emma, but she’s still out, her breath slipping out in little wisps of fog. Regina’s lips tilt up, partially in worry but mostly in relief. She’ll feel a lot better when Emma wakes up.

When she steps out of the plane, she feels that same sort of non-relief she feels about Emma. She’s glad that they aren’t on the edge of a cliff or half stuck in a tree, but there’s nothing but apprehension at the view around her. 

In any other circumstance, it would be worth admiring, but given the situation, the sight of nothing but the bare cold of nature around them is discouraging. She paces several meters away before circling the plane to see if there’s anything she’s missing, but all she finds are more views she can’t appreciate without any way home.

She shouts once.

She shouts again.

She shouts a third time, but nothing is different except the staggering echoes as they ripple over one another. She doesn’t need a GPS to know that there isn’t anyone around for miles, but that doesn’t mean the situation is necessarily hopeless.

After she crawls back inside, she shuts the door behind her and looks around the small space, dimly lit by the light from the windows nearly above them. Bug whines from his place next to Emma, and Regina offers him a smile she knows he can't understand. “She’ll wake up soon. I’m sure of it.” In response, Bug turns to rest his head on Emma’s thigh.

Regina rummages through the supplies she can find on the plane, between Neal’s stock and her and Emma’s luggage, there isn’t much, but it’s suitable for now. Clothes, some food, basic toiletries, some camping gear Regina can only assume was Neal’s, a blanket… There’s not much she can do in terms of organization, but she does what she can, finding a place for their resources and then moving the seats of the plane so that Emma might be more comfortable while she rests, lining them up into a makeshift bed. She starts a small fire in a metal tray to warm the space before turning to Neal.

Bug whines again, but Regina tries to pretend she didn’t hear it.

It’s unethical, she’s sure of it, but she takes his coat and his hat, anything she thinks they could use before wrapping him up in the parachute she found that’s lost its use and drags him from the plane. She stops at about fifty meters before she starts to hollow out an area in the snow deep enough to cover his body adequately.

The silence around her is unsettling, and all she can think is that this man deserves better. A funeral. A service. Anything better than a stranger burying him in the snow in the middle of nowhere, but it’s the most respectful thing she can do for him.

She’d brought Bug out so he could do his business, and now he sits next to her, watching curiously as she shovels snow with her gloved hands before he starts helping her dig. She thinks he’s just mocking her actions, or maybe trying to find something, but it breaks her heart nonetheless. 

She tugs Neal’s body into the space and covers it with snow. She gives him an appropriate moment of silence before marking the site with a piece of his plane that had been discarded during the crash and leads Bug back inside with her. Emma’s still asleep, but Regina’s just glad she didn’t have to see the body.

For the rest of the day, Regina tries passing the time by looking through all their supplies  _ again _ , fiddling with the broken radio, and trying not to think about their odds. She’s running out of ways to distract herself, and Bug is great company, but it isn’t the same as having someone to talk to.

It’s starting to get dark again, and with the darkness comes more cold, and Emma still hasn’t woken up. She shivers once, hard enough to make Regina think there’s a way to warm her more, and she makes the bold decision to layer her clothes more effectively. She doubts Emma would mind if it meant she would be warmer.

A part of her wants to curl up beside Emma, thinking the shared body heat could do them both some good, but Emma is already going to be shocked when she wakes up. Regina doesn’t need her proximity to jarr the blonde any more. She drifts off once again hoping that this is the last day she has to have spent without company.

Regina’s always been a light sleeper, so when Emma whimpers in her sleep, it startles Regina awake, and she’s by Emma’s side, prepared for the inevitable, but it doesn’t come. Instead Emma remains asleep, tossing as much as possible in the small space, so Regina waits patiently, ultimately making the decision to take the blonde’s hand in hers, leaving gentle strokes with her thumb to ease her awake.

When her eyelids finally flutter open, Regina smiles, and she brings her forehead down to rest against their joined hands. Emma, still half asleep, responds by tugging Regina up to perch next to her, but she doesn’t seem to be completely aware of the situation until her free hand is cupped around the back of Regina’s neck as the brunette resists, trying to avoid what is going to be incredibly awkward if Emma doesn’t come to sooner.

It’s awkward anyways, of course. Emma’s eyes widen as they adjust to the darkness and she realizes that Regina isn’t who she thought she was and she isn’t  _ where _ she thought she was. Regina tries to calm her down before she even has a chance to panic, but she only seems to make it worse.

“Emma,” she says and the blonde tries to sit up too fast, and she winces before realizing she doesn’t have enough strength to move anywhere, nor the space to do it. Her eyes frantically roam the cabin before they land on Regina’s once again. “It’s okay,” Regina lies. There’s a chance it could be helpful but she regrets it immediately as Emma’s eyes narrow.

“What’s going on?” The blonde’s voice cracks, and she doesn’t even bother to clear her throat. Regina moves to get her some of the snow she’d melted down for them to drink, But Emma’s hand is still grasping hers, and she tightens her grip. “Tell me what’s going on.”

“Let me get you some water, okay?”

Emma leans back reluctantly while Regina fetches the water, and as she holds the cup to Emma’s lips, she offers her a smile, holding her gaze until Emma’s finished drinking. 

“Do we have a lot of water? Or did I ruin the ratio?”

Regina snorts, “We’re surrounded by snow, so, no. You haven’t ruined the ratio.” Emma nods, wiping her mouth with the back of her hand. “Food is more scarce. We have enough for a few days if we spread it out. I’ve been able to keep a fire going, but eventually we’re going to run out of things to burn.”

Suddenly Emma looks panicked, and she props herself up as she tries to look around. “Regina--” 

“I haven’t burned any of your stuff. I wasn’t going to without--”

“No,” Emma interrupts. “Where’s Bug?”

The brunette chuckles as she turns behind her, prompting Bug to move to where they are. He dutifully jumps up next to Emma, coming to rest carefully against her good leg, his face landing near her hand. The blonde grins wide and strokes the soft fur behind his ears. “Hey, Bug,” she says to him, her voice incredibly soft, and Regina’s heart melts a little at the sight. It makes her worry just that much more about delivering the tragic news.

Emma looks up at her then, her green eyes full of worry, and Regina braces herself for the next question and the mention of Neal’s name, but Emma surprises her. “Are  _ you _ okay?”

Regina blinks, before nodding. “A bit sore. I didn’t have any major injuries, so I was really lucky. The worst I have is a cut on my arm, but--”

“Do you need me to look at it?”

Regina finds herself surprised once again, almost at a loss for words, but she chuckles. “I’m the one with the medical degree,” she reminds her.

Emma looks put out for a moment before crossing her arms, stubborn with an almost pout, and Regina almost laughs until she realizes Emma is actually a little upset about it. “So? I could still help. I’ve been out for god only knows how long, and you’ve been doing all the work.”

“It hasn’t been  _ that  _ long,” Regina responds with a small roll of her eyes. “You’re just being dramatic.”

The blonde just gives her a glare. “Okay  _ fine _ , but if you need my help, just ask me. I’m not useless, you know.”

Regina ducks her head, “Emma, I know.”

“Are you laughing at me?”

“No,” Regina says, grinning. Emma crosses her arms tighter against her chest. “You’re being silly. I’m fine, and if I weren’t, I would ask you for your help, okay?”

Emma watches her for a long moment before nodding once. “Okay.”

“Okay?”

“That’s what I said.” She takes a deep breath as she relaxes a little, her hand returning to Bug’s head. Regina’s almost forgotten about her anxieties regarding delivering the news about the pilot, so when Emma asks, “Where’s Neal?” Regina sucks in a breath sharp enough to answer the question. The blonde doesn’t seem surprised, but her eyes turn downcast with a soft, “Oh.”

Regina doesn’t know what to say so she says nothing, and lets the moment pass in silence.

* * *

 

“Killian must be so worried.”

They’ve been sitting in silence for so long that the words catch Regina off guard. She blinks in confusion, waiting for an answer until she doesn’t get one. Her eyes fall to the ring on Emma’s finger as if providing the answer. She suddenly finds that she doesn’t want it. 

“You married a man named Killian?” Regina can’t help but laugh.

Her laughter doesn’t faze Emma, and the blonde starts fidgeting with the ring. “We’re not married yet. Our wedding is...well it  _ was _ yesterday. Guess I missed it.” She shrugs noncommittally.

Regina’s brow furrows, thinking that something about it seems  _ off _ , but she doesn’t bring it up. She lets them fall back into silence, giving Emma space to express herself if need be, but she doesn’t.

This silence is heavier than the last, and Regina wants to just break it, hoping that it’ll snap the tension like a rubber band, but she can’t think of a single thing to say. She’s relieved when Emma speaks first. “I didn’t even call him.”

“What?”

“At the airport. I was going to, but I called my mother instead.” Emma laughs,” If you knew her, you’d understand. She’s not the kind of person you talk to when things are going downhill.” Regina nods. “I can’t believe I didn’t call him.” Regina doesn’t know how to respond to this either. She doesn’t know Emma well enough to comment, so she holds her tongue, knowing that it isn’t her place. 

The fire is starting to fade out, and Regina uses that as an opportunity to change the subject. “So I’ve started going through everything that we can burn, but like I said, I haven’t touched your stuff. I didn’t want to touch it without your permission.”

“Thanks, I appreciate that,” Emma smiles. 

“If you’re feeling up for it, we could go through everything now…”

She moves to get Emma’s bag and sits it next to her. Bug has to sacrifice his space for it, but he settles against Regina on the floor. It’s interesting, helping Emma go through her things. She has more paper than Regina does, and a lot of photographs. “I’m sorry we have to burn them,” Regina says as Emma hands a stack to add to their resources. “I can’t imagine.”

“Well, it’s this or freezing to death,” Emma snorts. “Besides, I back up all my stuff.” 

Regina nods. “Can I look at them before we have to…” she asks, gesturing at the fire. Emma smiles and nods before returning to her bag. 

The pictures she flips through are amazing. Most of them are shots of nature, animals, and people. There are a few locations she recognizes from Maine that she’s either seen pictures of before or actually visited. She can’t tell if the people are from Emma’s life or just people she’d seen around, or maybe a mix. She can’t explain why, but she pauses at every man photographed, wondering if any of them are Killian.

She glances over to Emma after one of them that could be, but she thinks probably isn’t (this one is of an older man, smiling wide and looking a little too soft to have a name like  _ Killian _ ), and Emma is watching her curiously. “My father,” Emma says. Regina nods and tries not to blush, a little embarrassed at being caught. “I don’t have any pictures of Killian.”

Regina turns back to the stack of pictures, shuffling through the rest a little quicker. There’s not anything specifically  _ telling _ about Emma’s pictures, yet they seem to hold so much meaning, tell her so much about who Emma is, even if there’s so much she hasn’t learned yet,

“Are you married?”

“What?” The question comes so out of nowhere, Regina can’t help but react harshly, turning to meet Emma’s gaze with a hard look, reacting without thinking. “Why would you think I was married?” Regina asks, looking down at her bare, ringless fingers, thinking back to anything she could have said that would have alluded to that, but nothing comes to mind.

Emma shrugs. She looks uncomfortable, though Regina supposes she ought to have reacted a little less negatively. “Just making conversation.”

“Sorry I snapped at you,” Regina mutters.

“It’s okay,” Emma says. “It’s just us so I really shouldn’t piss you off, huh?”

Regina snorts.

“Hey. so. Neal didn’t file a flight plan, did he? Have you tried contacting anyone with his radio? Or a phone?”

“He didn’t, no, but the radio doesn’t work. I tried it a few times while you were out, but no luck. My phone has battery life still, but we’re too high up for service. I turned your phone off too, to save the battery, but yours is almost dead. I’m not even sure it would stay on long after powering up.”

Emma nods. “So no one knows where we are?”

Instead of answering, Regina shifts into a more comfortable position, determined to get some sleep. She hasn’t let herself think too much about the odds, but they have at least some chance if they can contact someone, even if it means using a flare to alert a passing plane. She’s sure that the storm has moved far along, which opens the area back up for flights. A plane is bound to pass them eventually.

Emma doesn’t take too well to being ignored. “Hey,” she says, nudging Regina’s shoulder. 

The brunette looks back at her, “Let’s get some sleep, alright? We’ll talk about it in the morning.” Emma gapes at her, put off. Regina can tell she wants to say something, to talk about it  _ now _ , but Regina isn’t going to. Emma deserves at least one night untarnished by their lack of hope.

“Fine,” is the last thing she hears from Emma before the blonde leans back. She’s unable to turn away from her because of her leg, but Regina’s sure that Emma would if she could, judging by the way she crosses her arms and turns her head. 

Moments later, she calls Bug to her, and of course he goes to her, leaving Regina’s side, always seeming to prefer the blonde to her anyway. She misses the dog’s warmth immediately, and she rolls over, away from Emma, towards the small flames.

* * *

 

Emma’s still irritated when she wakes up the next morning, but it’s less at Regina and more at the fact that, as it turns out, she actually  _ is _ useless. If she  _ can _ walk on her leg, she doesn’t know because Regina won’t let her. All she gets to do is lie there while the other woman goes out to explore the area a little more. 

“ _ Just stay here _ ,” Emma says, mimicking Regina’s words before leaving the plane. “As if I have a choice,” she mutters, though it’s only Bug that can hear her. “At least I have you here,” Emma says, petting his head.

But Bug’s company only lasts so long, and soon enough, he’s whining and barking until Emma opens the door to let him out. She doesn’t resume her original position once Bug is out of the plane, nor does she close the door.

She’s  _ tired _ of just sitting here, especially when she doesn’t think Regina’s actually going to find anything. Not knowing how far Regina went makes things a little difficult, given that Emma’s about to sneak out of their shelter just to  _ move _ , but she doesn’t see her when she pokes her head out so she decides it’s probably safe.

She makes it about halfway out when she hears Regina shout. She’s half startled and half concerned, but she falls the rest of the way from the door anyways. Her body hits a patch of snow that’s icy but still softer than she was expecting, and her instinct is to laugh, but Regina rushes to her side in a near panic. Bug barks behind her as she helps Emma up, and the blonde scowls. “I had a handle on it.”

“Yeah, it sure looked like you did, the way you fell out of there like a ragdoll.”

“Oh, come on. That was hilarious.

Regina levels her with an unamused glare. “Let’s get you back inside.”

“I wanted to walk.”

“No.”

“What if I had to pee?”

“Do you?”

“No…”

Regina shakes her head. “Come on.” She takes Emma’s hand in hers and tugs her up until she can loop an arm around her waist. Standing isn’t so bad until she puts her weight on her left leg. An intense pain makes her wince and Regina snorts, “And here you were thinking you could walk.”

“I  _ can _ ,” Emma argues.

“Maybe later.”

The blonde huffs when she’s back inside, collapsing onto the makeshift bed. Regina slides in next to her, closing the door when Bug hops through and finds his place next to Emma, who’s taken it upon herself to fiddle with the broken radio.

“It’s not going to work,” Regina says, but Emma only shrugs. “You’re not going to give me the silent treatment are you?”

“No,” Emma answers, more of her attention on the radio. “If I was, I wouldn’t be able to ask you if you found anything.”

Regina quirks a brow. “I can’t see anything from here. There’s a place a little ways off that might have a better view, but it’s a bit of a hike. I didn’t want to go without talking to you first.”

“Can I go with you?” It’s a long shot, but she figures it’s worth it to at least ask even if she’s sure of the answer.

It’s exactly what she expects.

“You know you can’t.”

“Fine,” Emma says. She’s being ridiculous, getting mad at Regina for making logical choices, but she’s so frustrated with her inability to contribute that she can’t help but lash out. She lies back down and turns over as much as she can, accidentally kicking Regina in the process. She mumbles a small “sorry.”

The brunette sighs and gets up. Emma can’t tell where she is, but she jumps in surprise when she feels Regina sitting down behind her back. “Emma, I know you hate this. But you need to rest your leg. The last thing we want is it getting worse, alright? Do you trust me?”

Emma doesn’t answer.

“Look, I’m going to go now before it gets too dark. It shouldn’t take me more than a couple of hours.” She stills for a moment, and Emma just sits and waits, thinking the brunette is going to say something else, but suddenly Emma’s back is cold where Regina was sitting and she hears the door opening.

“Regina?” She says it fast but sits up faster, overcome with how important all of this suddenly feels. Dark eyes meet hers, unreadable but determined, and Emma finds herself wondering once again the kinds of people Regina has waiting for her at home, the people who are worried about her.

At the airport, Emma had only wanted to help her, but she’d done nothing but get Regina stranded in the middle of nowhere. No matter what the other woman thinks on the matter, Emma can’t help but blame herself.

“You can save yourself, okay? If you find something, or someone. You don’t have to come back for me.”

“Emma,” Regina starts, her voice a warning, almost angry. “I’m not letting you sacrifice yourself for me. I’m not letting you die out here.”

“But…” Emma says, starting slow, expecting Regina to cut her off, but it doesn’t happen. “If it weren’t for me, you wouldn’t even be out here. You might have been late getting home, but at least you would be  _ home _ .”

“You’re right, but what’s done is done. The fact is that we’re stuck out here together, and I’m not going to abandon you. We’re counting on each other.” She stares at Emma until she nods, and once she does, Regina is gone. 

The door closes with a hard click, and a while passes before Emma feels okay enough to relax again.


	3. Chapter 3

After about an hour, Emma starts to get bored. Which is  _ ridiculous _ considering there’s nothing to do even when Regina’s here, but something about not even having the option to talk to someone is just  _ the worst _ . Bug can’t sympathize, snoring against her knee.

Groaning audibly, she turns for her camera. She switches it on to take a picture of Bug as he naps, appearing blissfully unaware of their circumstances. She wonders if he misses Neal. 

To keep her mind from drifting to the loss of her friend, she turns her attention to all the supplies, looking through one of the bags just to see how they’re doing. Their food supply is more than seventy-five percent gone, which sends her into a panic. It’s not the kind of distraction she was looking for.

She tries again with the other bag, recognizing it as Regina’s, and she peeks out the window before she opens it. There’s nothing but white snow, but she doesn’t think Regina is on her way back anyways, so she turns her back to the window and starts to snoop.

It’s not her best idea, but a part of her thinks it’s only fair. Regina knows more about her personal life than she does about Regina’s, the woman hearing about Killian and looking at her pictures. 

But if she’d known she would find something, she would have left it alone.

There’s a picture in her wallet, a few actually. One is of a little boy in a sports uniform probably around five, and another is of Regina hugging the same boy. The one that stands out the most is one of the boy and another woman, opening presents together during the holidays.

Emma puts it away the minute she feels like she shouldn’t have seen it, but she thinks about it for a long time after, wondering who the woman and the child were. There hadn’t been a picture of just her and Regina, and they didn’t look like relatives, but she was there like she was family. She was sure the boy was Regina’s, resembling her in a handful of ways. Was the woman the boy’s other mother?

She tries not to think about it anymore, but when she gets her mind off of it, she just ends up drifting to Regina in general. Thinking about Regina  _ at all _ has Emma starting to panic again as she watches the light disappear past the window. 

Regina had said it shouldn’t take longer than a couple of hours, and Emma thinks that’s about the rime that’s gone by, but now that it’s getting dark, she would just feel better knowing Regina wasn’t stranded out there injured or dead at the bottom of a cliff. So she does what Regina would definitely discourage and makes her way for the door. 

Bug whines and gets up to follow, but Emma gives him a look. “You’re staying here.” The dog whines again and lies back down in place. “Sorry, boy. We’ll be back soon. Hopefully,” she adds, a little wary, though she tries not to let it show. Dogs can sense that stuff, right? Or is he whining because he knows something bad has happened to Regina?

Emma scoots her way across the body of the plane to unlatch the door and carefully get through it, careful not to hurt her leg any further. She shuts the door and starts limping along the plane, using it as support as she moves towards the ledge Regina told her about. 

It’s not so bad until she’s away from the plane, hobbling along and trying not to put too much pressure on her bad leg. She makes it a few steps before she falls for the first time, having stubbornly tried walking more normally, but she gets back up and keeps going.

It’s not until she’s thirty or so meters from the plane that she realizes there’s more than one ledge in the surrounding area. The one in front of her looks a little smaller than the one to her right, so she turns to change her direction, but the further away from the plane she gets, the more unsure she feels. 

She shouts Regina’s name a few times, hoping that if the brunette is nearby, she might answer, solving the location problem as well as alleviating Emma’s worries, but unfortunately, everything around her remains still and silent, except her heart, which is beating so heavy in her chest that it almost hurts.

She tries shouting as she moves back towards the new destination, her voice growing more desperate. The echo followed by more quiet is haunting, and she starts paying less attention to her steps and more attention to finding Regina. It’s probably not  _ smart _ , but Emma doesn’t care about  _ smart, _ she cares about ensuring Regina makes it out of here alive. 

But she falls again, and this space is less stable than the last, and she’s suddenly falling more, faster and further, and Emma hardly has time to register what her fate might be before her back suddenly runs into a rock. The collision knocks the wind out of her, and it takes her a moment to regroup, but eventually she sits up, keeping her back to the rock. 

When she looks up the slope, the plane is no longer visible which concerns her, but not as much as the view she gets peering over the rock telling her that if she had slipped in any other place, she would have been launched right off a cliff.

A part of her worries that she can’t make it up the slope with her leg, even though it isn’t steep and that if Regina isn’t okay or if she can’t find her, she’ll be stuck here. She’s about to call out for her again, just in case, when she hears her name shouted from somewhere not too far away. The sound and its resounding echo bring a smile to her face.

“Regina?” She yells back, breathing out in relief when she hears the other woman shout her name again even closer. She laughs a little when she sees her approach the top of the slope cautiously.

“Emma, oh my god, what happened?” She asks, the panic clear in her voice.

“I fell!” She shouts back. She can’t  _ hear _ the brunette’s scoff, but she can imagine it in the frustrated way her arms cross over her chest and the way she shifts carefully on her feet.

“Do you think you can get back up here? With your leg?”

This time Emma is the one to scoff, and she wonders if Regina can imagine hers in the way her arms raise before falling back to the snow underneath her. “How do you think I got down here?” But Regina doesn’t react, so Emma calls out an unsure, “Maybe?”

There’s another small silence before Regina answers. “Stay right there, okay? I’m going to slide down to you.”

“What? Are you crazy?” Emma asks, but it’s too late. Regina is already on her way down, trying to drift as slowly as possible so she doesn’t miss the rock. Just watching it makes Emma nervous. She keeps waiting for the inevitable moment where the brunette loses control, but the moment doesn’t seem to come. She gains a little momentum at the halfway point, which sends her nearly crashing into Emma, and Regina has to hold her arms out towards the rock to stop her from toppling completely into the blonde’s lap, which she ends up doing anyways.

Emma winces a little, though Regina landed more against her good leg than the injured one, and looks up at Regina apologetically. Somehow even after sharing such a small place, this is the closest their faces have ever been, and even though it’s getting dark, she can clearly see the brown of Regina’s eyes, the way they widen just slightly when they meet Emma’s and the way they shift when her eyebrows furrow in concern. 

“I didn’t hurt you, did I?” She asks, her voice soft in comparison not only to the shouts they had just shared, but most of their other conversations, and something about it draws Emma in and makes her nearly forget the answer. 

“Only a little bit, but it’s no big deal.”

Regina looks even more concerned. “Are you okay?”

Nodding, Emma offers a reassuring smile. “I’m fine.”

It takes a minute, but eventually Regina breathes out, nodding before shifting her position to lean against the rock next to Emma. “It’s not going to be easy, but I’m going to get us back up there.”

It’s more of a struggle than Emma’s anticipating, and her primary emotion should be fear, but all she can do is worry about Regina and feel bad because the other woman has to do all the work. Emma has both arms wrapped around her waist, while Regina uses the sharpest things they have on them to provide support in the ground as an extra precaution while she pulls them up the slope. 

There are a few moments where she stops and Emma tries offering to take over, but Regina shakes her head every time. “I’ve got this,” she says, and Emma just lets her, figuring the woman would rather have control, even if it means more work for her.

When the reach level ground, Regina takes Emma’s hands, and pulls her up the rest of the way before leaning back against the snow with a loud sigh. Emma scoots up a little so she’s sitting next to Regina’s head, looking down at her. “Are you okay?”

“Yeah, just catching my breath.” Emma watches the woman do just that, the exhalation coming out in heavier clouds than before. They’ve evened out a bit more when she speaks again, “Emma, what the hell were you thinking?” She sounds more concerned than angry, though the blonde can tell both emotions are there.

Emma shrugs. “I was worried,” she answers, the  _ about you _ left implied.

“You’re an idiot.”

“What?” Emma frowns, looking at Regina as the other woman makes her way to a standing position, arm outstretched to help Emma up. “Why?”

“You just are.”

Emma later finds out that the more elaborate answer was more along the lines of: “You can’t just go running off like that. You could get really hurt.” She groans at that of course, earning more sass from Regina, who follows it up with a stern, “No exceptions. We’re both going to stay here for a while.”

Regina sits back next to the blonde, a decided expression on her face that frustrates Emma to no end. She sits up like she’s about to stand up and make a scene, but since she can’t stand up in the space the plane provides, nor can she move too abruptly, she settles for turning towards Regina and staring in her direction until the other woman looks back at her. “What?”

“I don't think that’s such a good idea.”

“Excuse me?”

“Look, we’re almost out of food. We need to leave the plane.  _ Tomorrow _ .” 

Regina gapes at her, shocked. “Emma, you can’t even walk.”

“I can walk.”

“Then why did I have to save you from nearly falling off a cliff just a few hours ago?” Emma doesn’t have a response to that, besides to shrug and keep the set expression on her face, hopefully a match for Regina’s. She doesn’t understand the point in staying here if they don’t have food. They could make it without for a little while, but by the time they realized they needed it, it would be too late. “We’re  _ staying _ ,” Regina repeats.

“Then we’re dying,” Emma says, mostly a mumble as she leans back, crossing her arms over her chest and looking the other way.

She can feel the other woman looking at her, but she doesn’t turn around, unwilling to back down from the words she now knows Regina heard. “We’re  _ not _ dying.”

Emma tries. She really does, but something in Regina’s voice just sets her off, making her want to fight until the heat disappears from her eyes. “Well,  _ I’m _ not. You won’t either if you just do the smart thing and go with me.  _ No one _ is coming for us.”

“You don’t know that.”

Emma scoffs, “Are you serious right now? Of course we know that. Neal didn’t file a flight plan. We were on an almost three thousand mile flight. People may know we’re missing, but there’s no way they know where we are, and a search party could take weeks, months even, and by then we could be dead. Do you want that?”

“Of course I don’t want that,” Regina scowls. “But I’m also not risking my life just because you don’t know how to be patient.”

It’s a blow Emma hadn’t been expecting, and the circumstances of it all just make her more provoked. “You know, I didn’t have to go after you earlier, but I was worried about you. I didn’t want anything to happen to you. I didn’t have to help you at the airport either, but I--.”

“I wish you wouldn’t have. If it weren’t for you, I wouldn’t even be in this situation,” Regina snaps, turning away like she’s sure this is the end of the conversation, but Emma gapes at her. The same woman who had refused to let Emma sacrifice herself for her, the same woman of  _ I’m not letting you die out here _ is suddenly blaming her for this entire situation.

“Sorry for trying to do the right thing,” Emma says, not bothering to sound polite.

“Are you?”

The blonde scoffs again, “You know, I should be on my honeymoon. I should already be married. I missed my wedding, so it’s not like I’m  _ thrilled _ about being stuck here with you.”

“Who gives a damn about your wedding?”

“Killian does. I’m sure he’s--”

“Oh, shut  _ up _ about Killian. If he mattered so much to you, you would have called him at the airport. If anything, maybe you should be worried about your mother. She probably lost her mind when you didn’t show up. If anyone’s forming a search party for you, I’m sure it’s her. Your fiancé’s probably in a bar getting drunk off cheap beer.”

“He prefers rum,” Emma mutters.

Regina gives her an incredulous look, and Emma wonders if she shouldn’t have said that, considering the way it makes Killian sound, the way it makes  _ her _ sound, but what’s done is done. She tears her eyes away from Regina, shifting uncomfortably as the other woman doesn’t back down. When she finally speaks, her voice is more quiet but keeps it’s edge. “You know why I wanted to go home so badly? To see my son,” Regina says, her voice softening then, and Emma imagines the little boy she saw in the pictures earlier. “His tee-ball team had their first game the other day. Maybe it’s not a  _ wedding, _ but I had to miss it because of you, and my son probably thinks I’ve forgotten him.”

Regina sounds broken, but when Emma looks back at her, she still has a cold bitterness in her eyes before she turns away from the blonde completely, rolling away from her on her spot on the floor, and it’s all Emma can do not to try to remedy the situation, but when she so much as has her mouth open to say  _ anything _ , Regina seems to know.

“Don’t,” she says, cutting her off sharply. “You’ve done enough.”

It’s stings even more, and Emma just sits and stews in her irritation until she hears Regina’s breathing finally even out. It’s difficult to feel bad when the woman is hardly grateful, when she took back her kind words from the other night and spun them around to blame Emma anyway. 

But she has a son at home, and maybe a wife, or a partner. Emma’s not sure, but either way, she has people who  _ care  _ about her. But her words just echo in Emma’s mind, and when she finally settles in to sleep, she just feels worse.

It’s brighter when Emma wakes up, but she’s sure it’s only been a few hours. She had one of those sleeps that don’t solve anything, waking up just as bitter as she had been when she fell asleep, if not more, and when she sees that Regina’s still passed out next to her, turned away and scooted all the way to the other side, it just sparks something in Emma.

She doesn’t think, and she can already imagine Regina scolding her for it, but she won’t have to hear it because she’s going to have gotten them help by then.

Moving as quietly as she can through the cabin, she rounds up nearly all of their supplies, including Regina’s cell phone. If she can make it low enough, she can call for help. She finds a paper they didn’t burn yet and scribbles a message for when Regina wakes up.

She opens the door and slips carefully through it before calling Bug out with her. She doesn’t look back before she closes it behind her. This isn’t likely the last time she’ll see Regina after all. She isn’t  _ abandoning her _ , just going on her own for help.

A few steps away from the plane, she remembers how bad it was limping along with no support, and she fashions some kind of walking stick from scraps. It’s horrible, but when she gets to the tree line, she can replace it with something more stable.

“Come on, Bug,” she calls, and him whines once at the plane. “We’re going on a walk,” she says, which excites the dog and he bounds after her in the snow, running a bit ahead. Emma turns back to the plane one last time before moving on. “I’m not just going to sit here,” she says, and it’s more to herself than to Regina, but it gives her the determination she needs to turn around and start walking away.

She’s making the right choice.


	4. Chapter 4

When Regina wakes up, everything feels colder.

It’s inexplicable, really, the way a place that’s in the middle of nowhere, surrounded by snow and above the treeline could be colder, but it is. Not so much due to temperature, but maybe about space. It’s almost an empty kind of cold, and Regina shivers at the thought of loneliness before she sits up to find that she  _ is _ , in fact, alone.

“Emma?”

Her voice cracks a little, so the word doesn’t seem to come out all the way.

“Emma?!” She repeats a little louder, but her only answer comes from the wind as it swirls around the plane. It’s more stillness than she’s ever experienced, worse than when Emma wouldn’t wake up after the crash.

Even Bug isn’t here to provide any form of comfort, and the silence is terrifying, but not as terrifying as the thought of Emma being lost and alone out there, or the idea that she could have actually fallen off a cliff this time.

She’s up immediately, grabbing at everything Emma left behind, which is next to nothing, but she’s too concerned to be annoyed at the blonde’s lack of rationale. She almost misses the note Emma left on the row of cushions next to the door, but her eye catches it as she scans the small space one last time.

_ Regina, sorry for running off like this. I’m not leaving you to die, just going for help. I don’t want either of us to die in this stupid plane. - Emma (and Bug) _

With a groan, she stuffs the note in her bag and bolts from the door, hoping that the blonde hadn’t left  _ that _ long ago. She doubts she’s made it too far on her leg, and she hopes Emma was at least smart enough to wait for daylight to leave.

Yesterday, she had been so against the idea of leaving, but it’s taken losing Emma to realize that this isn’t just about  _ living _ but about  _ saving _ . The blonde may be insufferable and rash, but they’re relying on each other. 

Fortunately, Emma and Bug’s footprints are fresh enough that she can track her path easily, and she makes her way through the snow after them. She makes it over a hill and looks down to see nothing but more footprints, but she keeps on, impressed with how far Emma made it on that leg of hers.

She’s careful to look out for any wild animal tracks, or any indication that Emma had fallen anywhere, just to get an idea, but the path is relatively consistent. 

Eventually, she reaches a long stretch, clear of rocks or cliff edges, and she breathes out in relief when she can make out two figures in the distance, one definitely human, the other definitely an animal, harder to make out, but she can tell it’s Bug by the way he runs circles around Emma, as his tracks had shown her along the way.

“Emma!” She shouts, starting to run now that she knows the other woman is nearby. She doubts she can hear her, but she calls a few more times anyways. By the time she reaches her, the blonde nearly topples into her arms, weak from the hike, and it scares Regina how hard it seems for her to breathe. “Emma? Talk to me.”

“I…” Emma starts, her voice raspy and quiet. She clears her throat. “I shouldn’t have left you. I should have listened.”

“No, hey,” Regina says, taking Emma’s face between her gloved hands, “You were trying to look out for me, for  _ us _ , and I wasn’t listening. You were doing the right thing, and I shouldn’t have been so harsh with you.”

Emma turns her eyes down to avoid Regina’s, and the other woman reacts by pulling Emma in for a hug. The blonde falls against her easily but holds herself up enough that Regina isn’t supporting all of her weight. “It’s okay,” she mumbles into Regina’s shoulder.

“It’s not, but thank you for saying that.” Emma doesn’t respond, and they spend the next few moments just leaning against the other, Bug skipping around them. “Are you okay?” Emma leans back to look at her, putting more weight on her walking stick. 

“I mean… I’ve made it this far. Now that I have you to help me, we should be able to make it down to the tree line.” 

The blonde grins softly at her, and Regina nods back. Taking one of Emma’s hands in hers, she nods forward with a smile of her own. “Let’s go then.”

They walk on for a while, and Emma does really well, held up in part by her stick and part on her good leg as she limps along. Regina isn’t really helping that much, she thinks, but she keeps hold of Emma’s hand either way.

She can tell they’re getting closer, but with every step, Emma seems more tired and more out of breath. Regina’s feeling it more and more as well, active for the first time in days, and soon enough, her thoughts are filled with unlikely destinations, the dangers they could face, and too many  _ what ifs _ to keep her optimistic.

Talking would take up more energy, Regina supposes, but conversation would be nice, just to keep her mind from straying to pessimism, and while she’s sure Emma’s faring a little better, at least mentally (she seems to be the more optimistic of the two), she’s sure she wouldn’t mind the distraction.

“So,” she starts, not even sure where she’s going to take this until Emma glances in her direction and looks away again. “Your wedding.”

“What about it?”

“Tell me about it?” Regina suggests. 

Emma snorts, almost too quiet to be heard over the wind. “Well, the bride didn’t show up.”

Regina pauses at that, having expected Emma to launch into lavish details about her dress or the color scheme, her vows or who was walking her down the aisle, maybe even something about her fiancé, but even in this silence, it doesn’t come. 

“Think they were surprised?” Regina tries to joke, but Emma doesn’t laugh. She just keeps her eyes on the ground, and if she shrugs, Regina doesn’t notice through the bulky layers on the other woman’s body. She decides to drop it.

Emma seems to sense the growing tension and breaks the silence. “So, you have a medical degree?”

“Several, actually,” Regina laughs.

“But you do heart surgery, right?” Emma asks, glancing over at Regina, who nods. “What made you want to do that? You know, as opposed to anything else in the field?”

Regina doesn’t need to think on it before answering, “The heart is so arbitrary. Everyone always makes it sound so different, talking about their hearts being full of love, when they’re actually just full of blood. They draw them into this incorrect shape and leave them on notes to express a feeling, but that’s not even what a heart is. Humanity literally gave it a new shape and a new purpose, but the reality is that it’s just a heart. It does nothing but keep people alive.”

“Couldn’t you argue that love and passion also keep people alive? By giving people a reason to live?”

“Yes, but none of that can be attributed to the heart. The heart is just a muscle after all.”

If Emma has a response to that, she doesn’t make it, and it’s not long after that they reach the tree line.

* * *

 

Emma’s first response is to lean against the nearest tree trunk to rest, but Regina tugs her on. “Emma, if we stop now it’ll be harder to move on. We’ll stop soon, but I want to find a better place for you to sit down. Ideally a place where you can elevate your leg, especially since you’ve been putting so much pressure on it.” Regina moves closer to Emma, allowing the blonde to throw her arm over her shoulder. “Come on, I’ll help you.”

“Regina, I can--” But the brunette silences her with a look. Emma hates that Regina has to do all the work as she practically carries her through the trees, especially when the other woman is clearly exhausted. Fortunately, they reach a suitable resting place in a manner of meters, and Regina helps Emma down onto a rock that looks suitable for sitting before getting her leg situated. 

“Comfy?”

Emma laughs once. “As much as one  _ can _ be comfy in this sort of scenario. It is a little warmer down here though,” she adds with a small shiver. Regina raises her eyebrows. “I did say  _ a little _ .”

Regina nods in understanding as she drops their supplies and turns to take a look around. They’re close to a ledge, very steep, but the view is breathtaking. There’s mountains in the distance, peaked white, and the sky is a blueish gray that reminds Emma a little of the ocean but more lit up. She spots a few bird flying by, and a larger bird suddenly emerging from the distant treetops. They’re so  _ green _ , it almost makes Emma forget that it’s winter and that at this very moment, the cold is a threat to them, that everything around them is teeming with life while they’re struggling to fight for it.

In the middle of it all stands Regina, buried under layers of clothing, but she lifts her coat hood from her head and takes off her hat and just stands, hands on her hips, and breathes like it’s the first time she’s done so in a week. She turns back to smile at Emma, and everything about her is  _ bright _ and hopeful, and Emma can’t shake the thought that Regina is even more breathtaking than the view.

She doesn’t think about what it means, she  _ can’t _ , but when Regina turns back around, Emma stares for a long moment before she reacts, reaching quietly into her bag for her camera. She peers through the viewfinder with a smile, adjusts the aperture before putting the lens in focus. She snaps one picture just as the wind blows, pulling some of Regina’s hair with it and covering up the shutter sound.

When Bug runs over to Regina and sits next to her, grinning up with his tongue hanging out, Emma snaps another picture, smiling at the way Regina’s hand reaches for Bug’s hand without even needing to look.

She glances over her shoulder with another wide smile just as Emma snaps the third picture, and even though the blonde may be caught, she thinks it was definitely worth it. 

Regina’s smile shifts into something more suspicious, but it doesn’t go away. “Did you just take my picture?” she asks as she takes slow steps back to Emma.

Emma gives her a playful scowl, looking off to the side, “No, of course not, I was just…” She loses her train of thought when she meets Regina’s eyes again, watching her eyebrows raise in accusation as her lips tilt in sultry smirk. “If you must know, Regina, I was…taking a picture of Bug.”

“Mhmm.”

“And the view! Did you even see that thing? It was…” Emma trips up again as Regina ends up standing just in front of her, close enough to see the different flecks of brown in her eyes and the scar just above her lip, and she has to remind herself to breathe before she manages to finish her sentence in a raspy whisper, “...breathtaking.”

She tears her eyes away then, a little embarrassed for staring at Regina’s mouth so long, but the other woman doesn’t mention it.  _ Maybe she didn’t even notice _ . 

“Whatever you say,” Regina hums as she makes her way to another rock nearby and takes a seat before pulling out their canteen of melted ice. She offers it to Emma first, and Emma takes a couple of sips before passing it back.

“So what’s the plan?” Emma asks as Regina puts the lid back on the bottle. 

The other woman runs her tongue over her lips and looks off into the sky before turning back to Emma. “We should find shelter for the night. Get some tinder for a fire and then go from there.” The blonde nods as she puts her camera away. “When do you think you’ll be good to go?”

“Now?” Emma shrugs. “I mean, I’m still tired, and everything hurts, but it kind of always does. I don’t want to waste any more daylight. Plus the sooner we get to wherever we’re going, the sooner we can be settled.” Regina opens her mouth, but before she can talk, Emma shakes her head. “You don’t need to carry me anymore.”

Regina rolls her eyes, her lips turned up ever so slightly. “I wasn’t going to offer. Besides, I wasn’t  _ carrying  _ you earlier, I was just--”

“Supporting all my weight?” 

“Supporting  _ most of _ your weight,” Regina says, returning Emma’s grin.

They’re already up, moving back into the trees, Bug walking a little bit in front of them, sniffing everything he sees, when Emma turns to Regina. “Wait, what  _ were _ you going to say?”

“What?” Emma laughs, and Regina catches on before she can explain. “Oh, I was just going to agree with you.”

That makes the blonde laugh again. “ _ You _ were going to agree with  _ me? _ You know how crazy that sounds right? I guess we’ve come a long way.”

Regina shrugs. “Maybe there’s hope for us after all.”

There’s something about the way she says it that makes Emma’s heart lurch, and she wonders what the heart surgeon would have to say about that kind of phenomenon, but instead of asking, she just smiles. “Maybe there is,” she says, her voice soft.

She can tell Regina’s looking over at her, even as her eyes are downcast, and her heart makes another unusual movement when she glances over and their eyes meet. Regina’s smile is warm, unlike the cold around them, and for a moment it makes her forget that they’re lost in the wilderness at all.

Suddenly Bug barks once, enough to break the moment, and the two women look over at him, his stance torn between bracing himself and running forward.

“What is it, boy?” Emma asks, her voice wary, and Regina glances over at her uneasily.

“Emma... “ she says in warning, and the blonde looks over at her confused. Regina’s face has gone pale as she stares ahead, but it’s not until Bug barks again, jumping forward, spurring another noise, definitely coming from an animal but just as definitely not from Bug, that Emma realizes the threat looming just meters away from Bug is a bear.

Before Regina can stop her, Emma is already shouting for the dog and running towards him as fast as she can, her walking stick abandoned on the ground next to Regina. All she can think is that she needs to get Bug back, keep him away from the bear so the creature doesn’t get provoked any further, but when she’s suddenly there at Bug’s side, her knees on the ground as she tugs him closer to her, she realizes how close the bear is and how much more danger she’s just put them in.

She knows  _ nothing _ about bears. Is she supposed to yell at it? Is she supposed to run? Is she supposed to freeze as if to blend into the scenery? She tries to think logically, but when she sees the bear make a step towards them, all she can think is that she needs to run.

Emma holds Bug tight and shifts to a position she thinks will be easier to stand up from, but it only puts her more on the ground. She struggles to stand back up with the dog in her arms. He’s too heavy for her to lift, especially with a bad leg, and even if she had two good legs, she doubts she’d have very good odds. 

Regina’s yelling from somewhere behind her, but her heart is pounding so loud it’s all she can hear besides twigs as they snap beneath the bear’s paws. Bug wiggles in her arms as if trying to escape, and Emma tightens her grip, “Bug,  _ stop _ ,” she hisses down at him, but the dog barks once before growling, trying to protect Emma against the bear that growled first.

That’s when the bear charges.

Emma has no chance of getting up, much less outrunning the bear, so she uses her body to shield Bug, hoping that if anything, he might survive this to keep Regina company. She isn’t sure what Regina’s doing, but she hopes that whatever the brunette has done, it’s smarter than her own moves, and that Regina can make it out of here alive and go back home to her family.

For a moment it occurs to her that her dying thoughts are of a woman she just met rather than who they ought to be about. She’s sure that she should be worried about what Killian would do if he found out she was eaten by a bear trying to protect a dog and a gorgeous stranger, but she can’t bring herself to care. 

She hears the bear’s breaths as it runs closer to them, and she braces herself for whatever pain she’s about to get. She wonders if she were to push Bug away from the bear if he would run, but she doesn’t want to risk it, worried that he would try to protect her and get himself killed, or run to wherever Regina must have found safety, blow her cover and get them all killed, so she blocks him as best she can, pressing her face into his fur, eyes squeezed shut before the bear attacks, but instead of hearing the sounds of her bones crunching in the bear’s jaw, she hears Regina shouting.

Emma dares to peek up at the woman, now standing between her and the bear, standing tall and staring right at it. “Get out of here!” she shouts, her voice booming in the bear’s direction, who has stopped running and is slowly starting to back away. Regina shouts at it a few more times, and Emma watches in awe as the bear retreats.

It isn’t until the animal is completely out of sight that Regina crouches on the ground next to Emma, prying her away from Bug. “Are you okay?” she asks, her voice heavy, and Emma can do nothing but stare at her slack jawed as she takes in her tear streaked face and meets her wide eyes. 

“I… I’m okay,” Emma manages to choke out before Regina pulls Emma into her, her arms tight making a grip so tight around her that she can hardly reciprocate the hug, but her hands come to rest on Regina’s waist, and she figures that’s close enough. She wants to comfort the other woman, but she’s utterly speechless, with her heart still racing and her mind still trying to tell her that  _ this is it _ . 

Regina sobs into her neck while Bug whines next to them. His head comes to rest against Emma’s knee as the three of them stay huddled up on the ground together. It’s a long time before either of them break apart. Regina is the first to pull back, appraising Emma for any damage even though they both know the bear didn’t touch her. Emma doesn’t try to stop her.

“How did you…” Emma starts, but can’t find it in her to finish the question.

“Know what to do?” Regina finishes for her. She gives a small chuckle, and Emma smiles at the sound, grateful for it. “My son’s favorite animal is a bear. So for some days, they’re all he’ll talk about.”

“He’s taught you a lot, huh?”

Regina smiles, her eyes on Bug, petting him almost as a distraction. “He has.” There’s a momentary silence before Regina laughs again. “I’m sure he’ll be thrilled to hear I chased off a black bear.”

“That was a black bear?” Emma asks, her eyebrows raising as she looks back to where the bear was, despite it no longer being around. “But it was--”

“More brown? A year ago, I might have made the same mistake. Color and size are actually fairly unhelpful when it comes to telling them apart. It’s more efficient to look at their ears, claws, and the shape of their back. Besides, I don’t know exactly where we are, but black bears are significantly more common in the US, unless you’re in Alaska, in which case there’s a fair amount of them all.”

“Oh. Well, how’d you know to run at it like that? I can’t believe that worked.”

“Only on black bears. A grizzly bear would have been more territorial. That wouldn’t have ended well, as you can imagine.”

Emma nods, trying  _ not _ to imagine what would have happened if it had been a grizzly bear, or if Regina hadn’t have known or if she hadn’t have been there at all. “Thank you,” Emma says suddenly, looking up to Regina.

The other woman’s brow wrinkles just slightly. “For what? Teaching you about bears?”

“For saving my life,” Emma corrects. “And, well, the bear information too. In case we run into another, god forbid.”

“Let’s hope we don’t,” Regina says with a sigh. “Though at this point, we can never be too sure of anything. A lot of people believe humanity has the upper hand, and in some ways, I suppose that’s true, but out here with just the two of us, we no longer have security. We’ll need to be careful.”

“We should make a leash for Bug,” Emma says, rummaging through their supplies until she finds a rope to loop through his collar. “I don’t want a repeat of what just happened, and I definitely don’t want him getting hurt.”

Regina agrees before standing back up and reaching for Emma’s hand. It lingers for a moment before Bug starts to pull against the restraint, almost knocking Emma over. “I’ll get your stick for you,” the brunette says as she pulls her hand away. 

“Maybe you should take the leash,” Emma says when she gets back. “He keeps trying to run off and drag me with him. I’d keep it, but, well…”

Regina smiles as she takes the leash. “I don’t mind. Let’s keep moving. It’s getting late.”

They keep moving through the trees, racing against time as the sun starts to set, but they probably have a few hours left, and Emma can’t seem to worry about anything other than bears. So when they reach a cave not much later, Emma hesitates.

“No. No way, Regina. I may not know as much about bears as you do, but I  _ know _ this is the kind of place they like to live.”

Regina scoffs. “Emma, do you  _ see _ a bear?”

“No, but whatever bear lives here could be out hunting for food or something! Little does he know, food is about to walk into his home,” Emma adds with a mumble.

Regina shakes her head. “Don’t be ridiculous. We’re not going to be eaten by a bear.”

“Yeah, but--”

“Do you see a bed in there?”

Emma gapes at her, “Regina, this isn’t  _ Winnie the Pooh _ , this is real life! Of course I don’t see a bed in there!”

Regina laughs, “Not an actual  _ bed _ , Emma. A bed of leaves or anything the bear would sleep on.” She pauses, and Emma takes the opportunity to squint into the small cave. “See? It’s bare.”

“Oh,” Emma says, grinning, “So it  _ is _ a bare cave?”

Regina gives her a long blank stare before rolling her eyes and stepping into the den. “You’re an idiot.” Emma pouts as she trudges in behind her.

“I thought it was a good joke.”

“It was horrible,” Regina laughs. “You get everything settled here, alright? I’m going to get supplies for a fire.”

By the time it’s dark, they have a fire burning, bigger than any they had in the confines of the crashed plane, and the combination of that as well as being lower on the mountain means they’re in for as tolerable a night as possible given the circumstances, especially when no bears turn up looking for a place to sleep.

“They probably already have homes elsewhere,” Regina says, continuing to comfort Emma on the bear situation again. “Like I’ve told you, we have nothing to worry about.”

“Yeah, plus, you know what to do in a bear situation.”

“That too,” Regina agrees. “Here, Let me check up on your leg, okay? I want to make sure it hasn’t gotten worse.”

Emma leans back, readjusting so that Regina has better access to her leg. She watches as Regina carefully takes off the makeshift brace before glancing apologetically up at Emma. The blonde just stares back at her clueless.

“You’re going to need to take your pants off, Emma.”

“Oh,” she says. “Not a problem.” She’s grateful that the dim lighting of the cave covers her blush as she undoes her pants and slides them off, and she’s even more grateful for the blanket underneath her keeping her ass from freezing against the cold ground of the cave.

With her pants at her ankles, she keeps her eyes on Regina as she examines the wound, cleaning it up a little and apologizing softly when Emma hisses at the sting of it. “I think it’s going to be fine. It looks a little better than the last time,” Regina says, smiling up at Emma, who nods, her eyes on the gash in her leg. It looks better than it feels, but she doesn’t tell Regina that.

“That’s good.”

A beat passes before Regina pokes Emma gently on the thigh. “You can put your pants back on now.”

“Oh, sorry, I didn’t know if you were finished with me yet.” It takes a minute before Emma’s words really sink in, and her face burns when she realizes what that could have implied. “Checking me out, I mean.” Regina’s eyes go wide. “Not  _ me _ . My injury. Checking out my injury,” she stammers, but the damage is already done, so she laughs nervously as she carefully pulls her pants up over her legs.

“Do you need help?” Regina asks after a moment of watching Emma struggle.

The blonde laughs, “I’m sure as much as you’d love to have your hands on my ass, I think I’ve got it.” She freezes the second she says it, not sure where it even came from, and the near silence that follows is awkward, the only sound being Emma’s struggle as she finally gets her pants back on. Regina says nothing. “Sorry, I guess she wouldn’t like that too much, would she?”

Regina’s brows furrow together for another beat of silence before she looks away. “I’m sure Killian wouldn’t be too pleased.”

“Oh, yeah,” Emma says, having forgotten, her only concerns had been of Regina and the possible partner she saw in the pictures who she still hasn’t heard anything about and isn’t even supposed to  _ know _ about. But even without seeing the pictures, she figures if Regina has a son, she has a companion. Someone to watch him while she’s away for work.

She wonders if the other woman might talk about it, but instead of mentioning the partner, she says, “How do you know I even like women?”

Emma lets out a single laugh, “Please.”

Regina doesn’t confirm or deny, and they let the subject drop.

They ration out some of their food for some semblance of a meal and decide that they need to find a food source tomorrow. Regina tells Emma that for now, they ought to make the cave their base until they have a more solid plan, given that there’s a way for them to eat something in the surrounding area. 

By the time they’ve come to the agreement of tomorrow’s plans, Regina’s already settling in for sleep. The two of them are next to each other, the blanket underneath them rather than above them, and despite the fire and the cave walls blocking the wind, she’s still cold. 

She eyes Regina, who shivers only a moment later, and it’s enough to motivate Emma to speak up. “You know, it might be better if we shared body heat.”

Regina side eyes her. “Are you actually cold or are you just trying to cuddle with me?”

Emma snorts. “I just saw you shiver.”

“That doesn’t answer my question.”

But Emma doesn’t answer. She just rolls her eyes and scoots over to Regina, closing the space between them and readjusting the bags behind her so that there aren’t any weird gaps. “Come here,” she says looping an arm around the brunette’s shoulders. Regina curls over into her, resting her head on Emma’s chest as she pulls herself closer with a hand on Emma’s waist. “Better?”

“Much,” Regina answers. “Thank you.”

For a little while, the crackling of the fire is the only sound filling the cave, and it’s almost enough to make Emma drift off to sleep, but she can’t tear her mind off of the woman next to her. She feels bad for having invaded her personal space, and she thought that if Regina at least  _ mentioned  _ the woman Emma saw in the pictures, she would feel better, but so far, there has been no mentioning, and Emma just feels worse.

“I’m sorry, by the way, “ Emma starts hesitantly, “If I crossed a line earlier. And I’m sorry for running off this morning. And for putting us in danger with the bear. And for slowing you down. And for--”

“Emma, stop.” Regina interrupts. “I mean, thank you, but some of those apologies aren’t necessary. We survived the bear incident, and we’ve been reunited again. I don’t blame you for anything that’s happened, no matter what I said last night. I was… frustrated, to say the least, with how things were going. But I shouldn’t have said what I did. I should have listened to you, and I’m sorry.” Emma nods, shifting unconsciously closer to Regina. “ And you’re not slowing me down, okay? We’re stronger together, Emma. I really believe that.”

“You do?”

“Yes. Sticking together gives us our best chance.”

Emma lets that sink in, replacing all of Regina’s words from the previous night. It’s true, that much is clear. She thinks back Regina standing on that precipice, a contrast to nature. The environment around them has power over her, knocking her down whenever she finds her footing, but Regina is always there to help her back up, or save her life.

She peeks at the woman next to her out of the corner of her eye. She can tell she’s awake by the way she’s fidgeting with Emma’s zipper pocket, and the action brings a smile to her lips. In the time since they started cuddling, Regina’s rested half on top of Emma, her leg hooked over Emma’s good one. It’s the most comfortable Emma’s felt since the before the plane crashed, and somehow even longer. She can’t recall the last time she and Killian curled up together like this.

“I don’t even remember the last thing I said to him…” Emma finds herself muttering.

Regina stops messing with Emma’s zipper and her hand falls loosely to Emma’s side. A few beats pass before Regina responds, “The last thing I said to Henry was  _ I love you _ . It would have been better if I hadn’t have said  _ I’ll see you tomorrow _ beforehand.”

“Your son’s name is Henry?” She feels Regina nod against her. Emma doesn’t want to push, but she started this whole conversation, and she doesn’t want to let it drop without cheering the other woman up so she asks, “How old is he? You said he played tee-ball?”

“He’s seven, so this is the last year he gets to play.”

“He’ll have other games though? You said it was his first game the other day, right? So you just have to be sure to make it to all the others,” Emma says with an encouraging nudge. Regina doesn’t answer. Emma hesitates before she asks, “What about his mom?” 

But she can feel Regina stiffen against her, and she knows she’s messed up. “I am his mom,” Regina responds, her voice harsh and cold. Emma stills, not sure if she can say anything to make this better. 

“Regina, I--”

“Emma, please. Let’s just go to sleep.”

There’s a sharp finality to her voice that keeps Emma from saying anything else, but Regina doesn’t pull out of her embrace. The blonde hugs her tighter, her arms wrapped around Regina completely, and she hopes that it isn’t too much. 

She hears a soft cry escape Regina’s lips, and she boldly brings her own to the top of Regina’s head, leaving a gentle kiss there. “It’s okay,” she whispers, as soothing as possible. She repeats it over and over again until she thinks Regina’s finally drifted to sleep.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> [Here’s](http://www.orvis.com/what-to-do-in-a-bear-encounter-with-your-dog) a helpful link in case you ever have any bear encounters with or without your dog!


	5. Chapter 5

The next morning, they pack up their stuff and set out for the day. Regina keeps a hold on Bug’s leash as they walk through the woods, trying not to stray more than a few miles of the cave. “Hey, I’m gonna look over here,” Emma says suddenly, getting Regina’s attention. “I can see a little further away with my camera, so I figured before we went any further down, I could look off that ledge for a road or something.”

“Just don’t go too far, okay? Or fall off.”

“Regina, I’ll be fine, don’t worry,” Emma laughs, limping away. 

The ledge isn’t far from Regina, and by the time she gets there, she can still hear Bug’s happy barks in the background. She smiles when she hears Regina talking to him, ( _ “You think you can catch us a rabbit? A squirrel maybe? You don’t really look like you’ve been trained for that.” _ ) but puts her focus on her camera and the area in front of her. 

She’s not too high up, but high enough to see if there’s anything in the distance. She starts off to the left and works her way around, making sure she doesn’t miss anything, but it’s not until she’s looking as far to the right as she can that she sees anything.

There’s smoke off in the distance, consistent and pillared, as if it was man made. “Regina!” She pauses for a moment to listen for the other woman approaching, but when she hears nothing she turns around and shouts louder, “Regina!”

“Emma?” She hears from somewhere behind her, followed by a lot of rustling until Regina is running towards her, eyes wide with panic. “What’s wrong?”

“I think I see something,” Emma says, pointing in the direction of the smoke, but it’s hardly visible without the camera. Regina gives Emma a worried look. “Here,” the blonde says, putting the camera in Regina’s hands. “Look through here.”

It’s a bit awkward, Emma still has the camera strap around her neck, so Regina has to press close against her, but she doesn’t mind the contact or the warmth, but it’s not much later that Regina pulls away. “The smoke?” Emma nods.

“I think it’s man-made. It looks really mechanical, like it’s coming from a factory or something.” Regina doesn’t look so sure. “Either way, it’s our best shot. We know it can’t be a forest fire because we’d see more smoke, or the fire itself. If we see any people at all, we’re saved.”

“Do you think we should head over there?”

Emma nods. “We might want to wait until tomorrow morning to leave. We still need to find something to eat, especially if we’re going to be making a journey that big. We can prepare for it today.”

“Good thinking,” Regina agrees. “Do you think Bug could hunt?”

Emma just laughs, “No way. But it’s okay, I know a few things that could help us.”

They make their way back towards the cave, and along the way, Emma stops to examine some plants, picking some greens and berries and handing them to Regina to put into one of their dishes. The other woman watches her with furrowed brows, refraining from commenting until they’re back in their shelter, and Emma goes to eat a few of the berries they’d found.

“Emma, wait--” Regina says, her hand landing on Emma’s wrist to stop her. Emma looks back at her confused. “How do you know those aren’t poisonous?”

The blonde blinks at her before letting out a laugh and tossing the berries in her mouth. “They’re not. All these things are safe. Why else do you think I picked them?” While Emma chews, Regina continues giving her the same blank stare, looking lost, and it makes Emma laugh again. “What? Here, let me show you.” 

Emma points towards the berries, picking up one of each as she identifies them for Regina. “These are hawthorn berries, these are bearberries, but are also called uva ursi, which you might have heard before.” Emma glances up at Regina’s continued blank stare. “No? Okay well  _ these _ are wild cranberries, and I  _ know _ you’ve heard of those. These are conifer needles from a spruce tree, specifically a blue spruce or a Colorado spruce. Which doesn’t mean we’re in Colorado. Oh, and the bearberry leaves are also edible.”

When Regina doesn’t respond, other than her looking at Emma with more awe than confusion, the blonde offers her the bowl, “Here, try something.” She hesitantly reaches forward, takes one of the berries, and puts it in her mouth. She makes a face at the taste, and Emma laughs. “Bearberries aren’t very tasty. But at least they won’t kill you.”

Regina nods and keeps eating next to Emma. The blonde tosses a berry to Bug, but the dog just stares at it. “Fine,” she groans, reaching into the bag behind her for a strip of beef jerky. “You need the protein more. But you better savor it, there’s only two left. You can’t live on this bag of dog treats forever.” Bug huffs at her before chewing on the jerky.

For some time, they eat in silence, watching the sun start to set outside the cave, and they’re putting the rest of their gatherings away for the morning before Regina strikes a conversation. “So, what is Killian, like Paul Bunyan?” she asks with an empty laugh.

Emma snorts, “Yeah, right. He wouldn’t last two days out here.” Regina looks mildly surprised. “I was a girl scout,” Emma explains. “All through grade school.”

“Look at you,” Regina smiles. “And you thought you weren’t contributing to our survival.”

“Yeah, well. You saved me from a  _ bear. _ This is nothing in comparison.” Regina waves her hand dismissively. “Seriously, Regina. That was amazing.”

“We have Henry to thank for that. Not me.”

“I’ll be sure to tell him,” Emma grins. “Hey have you ever thought about signing him up to be a cub scout? He might like that. Especially if he likes bears. In third grade he would be a Bear Cub. He’s in first grade now, right?” Regina nods. “So if he signed up next year, he could start as a wolf cub.”

“How do you know all the Cub Scout rankings?” Regina asks, grinning at Emma.

The blonde laughs, “I would have  _ killed _ to be able to call myself a Bear Cub. Instead I had to be a Brownie. It was still fun, but I liked the sound of Bear Cub better. You know, Bears were my favorite animal when I was a kid too.”

“Really?”

“Yeah,” Emma says, absentmindedly messing with her shoe strings. “Yeah, I think you should think about signing him up. It was really educational too. I learned so much. Made a lot of friends. And if he keeps it up through high school, it looks good on a college application.” Emma nudges her shoulder gently until the other woman glances up at her.

Regina’s quiet for a moment as she nods, processing the information. “I would just be worried that he might get hurt. I’m a little overprotective, I suppose,” she admits turning her head down. She laughs only a moment later. “But then again, here we are, stranded in the middle of nowhere, getting hurt left and right. If it weren’t for you, I doubt we’d have food. Not to mention you’ve been setting up some really great fires. Maybe I should sign him up.” 

“See?” Emma laughs. “This horrible adventure has been good for a few things. Henry’s gonna love it.” Regina smiles, her eyes on the fire, and Emma wonders what’s if she’s imagining little Henry in a cub scout uniform, proudly smiling into the audience at his badge ceremony, looking for Regina, looking for his moms. 

“What would your partner think?” Emma asks, this time not even considering the question. Regina’s head turns to her, that look on her face again, and Emma shakes her head, “Sorry. I figured you weren’t married because you don’t have a ring, and when I asked you the other day, it sounded like you weren’t.”

“But you still think I’m with someone…” Regina says, her voice low, almost accusatory.

Emma shrugs, trying to reason her way out of this without admitting to snooping in Regina’s stuff. “Well, yeah. You haven’t said anything about who watches Henry when you’re at work or when you have to travel, so I just kind of figured--”

“We don’t all get a happily ever after,” Regina snaps, her eyes distant and cold as she turns away from Emma. The blonde sits back, stunned, wishing she hadn’t asked. “We’ll leave first thing tomorrow,” is the last thing Regina says before she lies down, her back to Emma.

“Okay,” Emma mumbles, leaning back where she was, next to Regina, but not close enough to be touching. She’s colder than she was last night, less comfortable, and she misses Regina’s warmth and her company, but right now, she doesn’t feel like she deserves it. Her mind races as she wonders what happened in Regina’s life that’s made her so closed off or if there’s anything she could do to help.

It takes her longer to fall asleep, and when she does, she dreams about holding Regina in her arms again, keeping her warm and safe and happy.

* * *

 

The next morning, Regina talks to her like the previous night hadn’t happened at all, and Emma just goes with it, not wanting to bring it back up. They don’t talk much as they put the fire out and pack everything up, and Emma spends most of that time trying not to think about her dream last night or Regina’s comment on happy endings.

They’ve been walking for a few hours, Bug on his leash and fighting it the whole time. “I think he hates it,” Regina finally says, dropping it with a sigh. Bug immediately darts forward, happy for the freedom. 

“But bears!!”

“Emma,” Regina chuckles. “It’ll be fine. Don’t worry so much about the dog. He knows what he’s doing out here, probably better than us.”

“Sure, okay,” Emma grumbles, her eyes on Bug as he runs around ahead of them, refusing to look anywhere else, just in case. “Do you think we’re still moving in the right direction?”

Regina nods, “If we keep heading this way, yes. We’ve been going straight, more or less. As long as nothing gets in the way, we have nothing to worry about.

But of course, they have everything to worry about.

It’s a few hours later when Regina comes to a stop. Emma turns back to look at her. “What is it?” 

“Do you hear that?”

Emma squints and looks around, listening for whatever Regina could be referring to, and then-- “It sounds like water.” Regina’s already taking a few brisk steps past her in the direction of the sound.

She groans audibly before announcing, “It  _ is _ water.”

It takes Emma a minute to catch up, limping forward with her stick, but when she sees the ravine in front of them, she has to repress the urge to hurl the stick off the edge in frustration. Instead she has to settle for screaming at it.

“Emma, calm down. We’ll just have to find another way. Go around it.”

The blonde looks over at the other woman like she’s lost her mind. “Are you kidding me? We don’t have  _ time _ to go around. Look, there’s gotta be a way down there,” Emma says, peering over the edge. “See, there. It’s not a lot of space, but it wouldn’t be impossible to hike…”

“Come on, we have to be reasonable about thi--”

“Reasonable?”

“Yes,” Regina says calmly, a contrast to everything Emma feels right now. “We won’t survive doing it your way.” Emma’s eyebrows raise at her choice of words. “I didn’t mean it like that. Look, we need to be smart. We can’t afford to take risks like that.”

Emma scoffs, crossing an arm over her chest before letting it drop again, gesturing as she talks. “You do realize that we’re fucked right? We’re lost in the middle of nowhere in freezing cold weather with snow halfway up our shins. If we knew we were going to reach civilization soon, then we could do it your way, but we don’t know anything. There could be nothing for miles, and we’re going to die wasting time and getting nowhere. That smoke is the only thing we’ve got, and it’s still miles away in  _ that _ direction,” she says, pointing across the ravine. 

“Emma…” 

“Are you really that much of an optimist?”

“No, I--”

“Then cut the shit, Regina, and admit that you’re just as scared as I am.”

Emma’s voice has raised to a yell, and she’s closer to Regina than when she started, but she doesn’t back down or look away. She stands, waiting for Regina’s admission, but it doesn’t come. “I understand you’re scared, Emma, but that’s no excuse for doing something that will almost definitely get us killed.” 

The blonde gapes at her, shaking her head in disbelief. “Of course you would say that. Of course you, the heart surgeon, would refuse to follow anything but your stupid, logical brain.”

Regina lifts her hands, exasperated, “Well what else--”

“Your  _ heart _ , Regina, you follow your  _ heart. _ I know you say that’s not how it works, but it’s what’s driving us to survive right now, and if we go your way, we might not make it either. If we go my way, at least we knew we were going in the right direction.”

“Emma, you’re not making any sense,” Regina says, her voice growing softer. “We’re going around, okay?”

“Why?” Emma shouts, one last try. “Why can’t you just…” but she can’t finish. The tears escape first, and before she knows it, she’s sobbing into Regina’s shoulder. “Why can’t you just listen to me?” she finally asks, her voice just a whisper.

For a long moment, Regina just holds her there, one hand at her waist, pulling her tight, the other cupped at the back of her head. Finally she speaks, whispering back in Emma’s ear, softer than the blonde expects. “I’m scared too,” she finally confesses. “I’m afraid of dying, and I’m afraid-- I’m…” she trails off for a moment, and Emma lifts her head from Regina’s shoulder to meet her dark eyes in time for her to admit, “I don’t want anything to happen to you.” 

A sob Emma isn’t expecting escapes her lips when she takes in Regina’s words and that look in her eyes that lets her know that the other woman means it. She isn’t sure anyone’s ever looked at her with so much care and compassion. She rests her forehead against Regina’s, and the brunette pulls her hand around so that it’s resting against Emma’s cheek. Her glove is cold and kind of damp from the snow, but Emma leans into it anyways. “Okay,” Emma says.

“Okay?”

Emma takes a deep breath before relenting. “We can find another way. I trust you.”

Regina’s lips tilt up in the smallest of smiles before she takes her hand from Emma’s face to lace their gloved fingers together. “I’m not gonna let anything happen to you, okay?” 

“Or Bug?” 

Regina gives her a watery smile. “Or Bug,” she affirms. 

“I’ll look out for you too you know.” 

“How’s that,” Regina snorts, “You can barely walk.” 

Emma glares at Regina, but breaks it with a laugh. “Well, besides the fact that I’ve provided sustenance for us… I’m warm? If you don’t mind the cuddles, that is.” 

“I think we’ve already established that I don’t,” Regina points out, and the smile on her face is radiant. Emma returns it before they start to head in a new direction, still hand in hand.

Emma feels more at ease with the new direction with every step they take, but by the time it gets dark, they’ve still gotten nowhere. “This is useless,” Emma mumbles. 

“Hey,” Regina says, squeezing her hand. We’ll make it tomorrow, alright? We should find a place to settle for the night.”

There aren’t any caves nearby, but there is a hollow that feels safer than most areas. Emma settles in while Regina goes off for firewood supplies, and then again for anything edible. By the time she returns with her best guesses at edible nature, Emma’s already got a fire going.

“You’re getting better at this,” Emma says, while she looks at what Regina brought back. She’d spent a lot of their journey today pointing out plants and how to tell the difference and testing the other woman’s knowledge a little further along. Regina is less confident in her skills, but Emma doesn’t have the same apprehensions, grinning at the other woman as she eats first.

“As long as I don’t accidentally kill you…” she says, starting to eat shortly after. “You should make me do the taste testing since it would be my fault if we were to be poisoned.”

“No way. You’ve got a son at home. If only one us has to get out of here alive it’s gotta be you.”

“But what about Killian?”

Emma stops chewing for a moment, shocked once again that she’d forgotten to consider him. She wonders what he’s doing right now. If he’s more worried about where she is or more angry at her for missing the wedding. “I guess,” she shrugs. “But your son needs you more than Killian needs me.” Regina’s eyes widen. “What I mean is, a son needs his mother more than a husband needs his wife,” Emma stammers, but it doesn’t sound much better. “You know what I mean.”

Regina pauses for a moment, watching Emma with a unreadable expression on her face. “Do I?”

“I mean… maybe. I don’t know,” Emma says. “I don’t think I’m hungry anymore.” She pushes the container back to Regina before lying down, her eyes closing as she tries to clear her head.

It’s no use. All she can think about is what’s going to happen if they make it out of here, what could happen if they don’t, and why both possibilities leave her with similar feelings of dread. She should want to be back at home in her comfy bed curled up with her fiancé (or is he just her boyfriend now?) but she can’t help but wonder if she’d rather just be in a  _ bed _ anywhere, maybe even without him there.

Then Regina is there, curling up next to her same as she had the other night, and Emma doesn’t even have to think about wrapping her arms around the other woman, she just  _ does. _ Regina is warm in her arms, and when she feels her smile against her neck, Emma feels warm everywhere.

“By all means, make yourself at home,” Emma jokes.

She can feel Regina’s breath as she laughs. “Oh, I will.”

Emma smiles even wider before she turns her head and leaves a kiss to Regina’s forehead. It’s another thing she does absentmindedly, and she freezes just after when she realizes what’s happened, but Regina doesn’t react in the negative. She just pulls Emma closer.

“Are you still cold?” 

Emma doesn’t want Regina to feel like she’s to blame, but she shivers violently out of nowhere, giving the answer away. Their location feels safe, but the ground is wet and cold, and there’s only so much they can take.

“It’s okay,” Regina reassures her. “I think it’s just going to be one of those nights.” 

“Hopefully it’ll be the last one we have. Or at the very least, the worst one we have. The rest of them haven’t been so bad. Maybe…” but she shivers again and can’t complete the thought. A part of her doesn’t want to. Neither of them want to imagine staying out here any longer than they have to, but it’s hard to keep hope when everything feels so hopeless.

Regina seems to feel the same and doesn’t comment further. She just nuzzles into the blonde’s neck and whispers a soft, “Goodnight, Emma.”

* * *

 

The night is as restless as they expected it to be, and by the time the sun comes up, the only thing driving them forward is their desire to be anywhere but where they are now. So they travel on, and the only one of them that seems to be energized at all is Bug, who leads the way as if he knows exactly where he’s leading them to.

After hours of hiking, they break out of the trees to a vast area, nothing but snow, and Regina groans, looking off in the distance. “I’m pretty sure that smoke was nothing. That or we ended up going the wrong way. We passed where it should have been already, I’m sure of it.”

Emma shrugs as she limps past her. “Well let’s keep going anyway. You never know.”

“Who’s the optimist now?” Regina quips, and Emma turns back to gape at her, finally laughing when she sees the grin on the other woman’s face.

“Shut up. We should take a break soon though,” Emma says. “My leg’s starting to hurt.” As soon as she says it, Regina is by her side, easing Emma closer to her. 

“Come on,” she says, supporting the blonde even s she protests. “There’s place over there you can sit and elevate your leg.”

“Do you think you need to check it out again?”

Regina stops to side eye Emma. “Ha ha, very funny.”

“I’m serious,” Emma whines, but she’s smiling despite it.

“Maybe tonight if we have a suitable enough shelter. But not now. I’d be worried you’d get sick.”

“Honestly, I’m surprised one of us hasn’t already.”

Regina shrugs as she lowers Emma down onto the log in front of them. “Our bodies have been acclimatizing. The human body can be quite phenomenal.”

Emma laughs, “You’re not wrong.”

Regina isn’t sure how to answer, but she isn’t thinking about it for long. She’s just helped Emma get situated with her foot raised on the log next to her when Bug starts barking and darting across the snowy field.

“It’s a rabbit!” Emma yells. “Get it, Bug! You can do it!”

“Emma, shh, don’t distract him.”

“Regina! Go! If he kills it, you have to get it from him so we can cook it. If you want I can start up a fire while you’re gone.”

“I--” Regina starts, but Emma cuts her off.

“Run! Regina, you have to  _ run _ !” So she does. She wishes she didn’t still have the backpack slung over her shoulders while she did, but it was too late to think about that as she chased Bug, finally catching up to him just as his jaw closed around the rabbit’s neck. 

Regina stops in her tracks, shocked that Bug  _ actually  _ caught it. Bug turns to grin at her, panting as he smiles, and she runs over to pick up the dead rabbit by its feet. “Good, boy,” she tells him in that same puppy voice Emma’s always using.

She’s not sure what to  _ do _ with it, so she just stands there for a moment, arm outstretched so she doesn’t have to worry about getting blood on her or Bug, even though she’s sure it hardly makes a difference. She’s about to turn and head back to Emma when Bug barks again and takes off in the wrong direction. 

For a moment, Regina panics, thinking it might be another bear, so she follows him, but when she sees Bug running up the stairs of a small cabin, her jaw nearly drops. She runs over to it, knocking loud on the door and peering in the windows before walking inside. “Hello?” she calls out, listening for an answer and receiving silence. She almost laughs when she sees there’s a bed and a fireplace. 

She can’t wait to tell Emma. 

Dropping everything down, and leaving the rabbit where Bug can’t reach it, she leaves the front door and starts walking back to where Emma is, feeling elated. This isn’t as good as being rescued, but it’s the next best thing. She’s not even sure what state the cabin is in or if there’s any food or supplies, but nevertheless, it’s  _ shelter _ , and there’s an adequate place to rest. 

Regina’s beaming as she walks back through the trees, but her smile drops as she hears Emma scream out for her. Once, then twice, and Regina’s already broken into a sprint before she hears the third scream, and she breaks from the trees in time to see Emma disappear into the ground.

She hardly has time to process what’s going on before she’s there at the opening of ice that leads into the lake, and  _ of course _ they stopped on a frozen lake. But she doesn’t stop to chastize herself or wish she’d used her brain  _ this time _ like all the others, because all she can think is that Emma is drowning in freezing water. 

Fortunately, they’re right on the edge, so Emma isn’t sinking too low for her to reach, but it’s hard to pull her out, the water seeping into her clothes making her almost too heavy. There’s a moment where Regina’s sure she’s about to fall in too, but she doesn’t.

She can feel the water soaking through her gloves and the tops of her sleeves, and it’s so cold that it  _ hurts _ , but her adrenaline is kicking in and soon enough, she’s pulling Emma from the water. She takes a moment to make sure Emma’s breathing before moving on.

Using the adrenaline while she still has it, she slides Emma across the ice before managing to carry her toward the cabin. She strips Emma down the minute they get through the door, and takes off her own coat and gloves, anything soaked by the water, and carries Emma to the bed. She rummages through the dresser and closet to find some dry clothes, but all she finds are blankets. She takes them all and wraps them around Emma before getting a fire started.

She keeps her mind calm as she takes careful methodical steps, her priority being Emma. Before long, she has a fire going and has managed to pull the mattress to the living room, laid out on the floor by the fireplace, and she carries Emma in there shortly after.

She panics for a moment when she thinks about Emma’s state, and how hard her recovery is going to be given the past few days. She has definitely gone into shock and is likely dehydrated, but Regina can’t have her drink water in this state. 

In some last minute searching, she finds a medical kit that is mostly unhelpful, but the thing that catches her eyes is a syringe. A way to hydrate Emma. She sterilizes the needle and prepares everything she needs as best as she can to make an IV drip, but nothing changes the fact that they’re in a cabin and the middle of nowhere with slim resources, and when she has it all set up, about to slide the IV into Emma’s vein, she’s brought back to the argument they had at the ravine.

At the ravine, there was an immediate way with high risk, a roundabout way with less risk, but regardless, there’s risk involved. This situation is the same.

Needle in one hand, Emma’s wrist in the other, Regina takes a moment to process this whole situation. The other woman is in shock, severely dehydrated, and Regina has no idea when she’ll wake up, and despite this being arguably the most effective option, there’s so many ways it could go wrong. 

_ But what would Emma do? _

She would have gone down the ravine. She would eat the berries first. She would put all her trust in Regina. She would let Regina live even if it meant she didn’t. She would use the IV. 

So Regina does.

* * *

 

Everything goes according to plan, much to Regina’s relief, except that it’s an entire day later, and Emma’s still unconscious.

In some ways, it reminds her a lot of her first few nights out here, right after the plane crashed. Emma was out the whole time while Regina busied herself with the same things over and over until she woke up, unsure of what to do while she waited for her only human companion to finally come back to her.

But this is different in a lot of ways. 

There’s more for Regina to distract herself with. She melts a lot of snow, collects firewood, finds a way to preserve the rabbit meat until Emma is awake to share it with them. She cleans up Emma’s leg and rebandages it, and she uses a wet rag to clean some of the dirt from Emma’s body, wanting her to feel as refreshed as possible when she wakes up.

There’s more to investigate around the cabin than in the plane. She finds that there’s no chance of powering the place up, but she also finds some canned foods that are still good, and something to cook them in. She finds a few more blankets and brings them all over to Emma, hoping it’ll help.

Bug spends most of his time in between Emma and the fire, occasionally glancing up at her with sad eyes, and when he isn’t there, he’s outside with Regina while she forages for more berries and edible plants. She doesn’t know what she’d do if Emma hadn’t taught her all that she had.

Most of Regina’s time is spent next to Emma, either lying by her side on the bed, trying to get any rest or just sitting on the floor next to her, Emma’s hand in both of hers. She tells her stories about things she’s done or found and what Bug has been up to. She tells her stories about Henry playing tee-ball or stories from work. She tells her about going to the beach, as if planning a trip for just the two of them, a reassurance - no, a  _ promise _ \- that Regina will get her home safely.

The longer the blonde is out for, the more nervous Regina gets, but she holds it together, reminding herself that Emma was out for longer after the crash and she was fine, but something about this time is significantly different than the first. She’s more attached now.

Initially, Emma was important because she was the only other survivor. She and Regina needed to rely on each other for survival, and depend on the other for everything. None of that has changed, but now Emma is important for a whole other reason.

She’s important because she’s  _ Emma _ .

Regina isn’t entirely sure what that means, but she is sure that when Emma finally shifts in the bed and her eyelids flutter open to reveal the beautiful green beneath them, Regina has never been more elated in her life.

She grips Emma’s hand tighter in her own and beams down at her from her seat on the floor and watches as the blonde blinks a few times before rubbing her eyes with her free hand and looking over at Regina.

“This hospital sucks. I thought they were all supposed to have heating and smell like idorofrom.”

“You mean iodoform?” Regina laughs.

“Yeah, whatever,” Emma says, her voice sluggish. “This is a bad hospital cause it smells like death. I’m not dead am I?”

“No. you’re very much alive,” Regina reassures her. It’s impossible to wipe the smile from her face now that Emma’s awake, especially not with how adorably loopy she is. “We’re in a cabin.”

“In the woods?” Emma asks, her eyes a little wider.

“Yes…”

“Is it haunted?” Regina laughs, and she can feel it in her chest, the way Emma’s presence has just lit up her whole world. She brings Emma’s hand, still laced with hers, to her mouth as if to hide the grin behind it, but she can tell it does nothing, the reflection of her feelings shines in Emma’s eyes and the way her lips brush softly against the blonde’s knuckles. 

“Hey, Gina?” Emma asks, the smile faltering slightly as she does. “Can I call you that? Is that okay?” 

Regina chuckles, “You can call me whatever you’d like.”

“Okay good,” Emma smiles. “Does this cabin have grilled cheese?”

* * *

 

Emma’s been awake for a couple of hours now, and she doesn’t feel  _ that _ much better. Everything still hurts, but it doesn’t matter because Regina hasn’t left her side once.

She’s been sitting next to her, Emma’s hand gripped tightly in her own, telling Emma stories about what she’s found in the cabin and how she hydrated Emma and what she and Bug have been up to, and all Emma can do is make a dopey grin at her as she talks. 

“You carried me all the way over here?” she asks in the middle of the story of how Regina and Bug found the cabin. She hadn’t gotten to the story of what happened to Emma yet, and in this moment, the blonde can see why. Regina’s eyes are wetter than they were a minute ago, and when she answers, it’s with a nod rather than words as she brings their joined hands to her mouth again. Emma smiles at her. “You’re like a superhero.”

Regina closes her eyes then, and Emma’s almost positive she feels Regina kissing her hand again, but she doesn’t comment on it. Instead she waits until Regina’s eyes open once again, meeting hers with the confidence she’s used to seeing, rather than the fear.

“So I fell in a lake…” Emma starts, trailing off as if seeking answers, even though she remembers standing on the ice, remembering the way it started cracking beneath her.

“You did,” Regina confirms, her voice level.

Emma laughs once, “I thought a swim would be nice,” but Regina just looks at her, almost on the verge of tears once more, and Emma doesn’t laugh again. “You saved me.”

“I couldn’t let you drown, Emma.”

It’s amazing, the sincerity in the other woman’s voice. The way she risked her life just to make sure Emma had a chance when she’d been shooting down risks throughout this whole journey. She could have died saving her from that lake. “Yeah, but--”

“No buts. You’ve been saving me this whole time. It was just my turn.”

“Are you kidding me? I’d be dead without you Regina… this time and countless others.”

Regina shakes her head before she answers, and Emma feels a tear hit her hand where the other woman’s still holding it close before she sees the rest of them filling her eyes. “But you’re not.”

Emma smiles at her, trying to be strong enough for the both of them with just one look. “ _ We’re _ not.”

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> [Here’s](https://www.growforagecookferment.com/what-to-forage-in-winter/) some information on edible plants and stuff you can find in the winter!


	6. Chapter 6

That night is the first night Regina gets legitimately adequate rest. Part of it has to do with sleeping on an actual mattress, even though it’s not the most comfortable or exactly spacious, it’s certainly better than a cramped and crashed plane or the hard floor of a cave, and it’s even better with Emma by her side. Or rather, in her arms.

She holds Emma close to her the whole night, as if it can somehow protect her from any bad dreams she may have. If the smile Emma has on her face the next morning is any indication, Regina thinks it worked.

They spend the morning just lying together and resting. It’s the first time they don’t need to be bundled up in the same filthy clothes for warmth, instead relying on some blankets and the fireplace for heat, not to mention each other, and out of all the times they’ve cuddled together, this is the most intimate, bare arms brushing against the other’s, bare legs tangled under the blankets, and Regina’s hand running through Emma’s hair.

“It’s probably disgusting,” Emma says, but she makes no motion to move away.

Regina responds with her lips brushing softly against the blonde’s temple, “It’s beautiful,” she says, and it scares her how much she means it.

Eventually she gets up to cook the rabbit Bug caught, deciding to mix it with a can of vegetable soup for Emma. The blonde watches her from the bed, an absentminded smile on her face. “Are you gonna feed me?”

“If you’d like me to.”

Emma gives her a cheesy grin. “Yes, please.”

When it’s ready, Regina brings the soup to Emma, helping her sit up. “You’re okay, right? To sit up on your own?” Emma nods, her hands resting in her lap. 

“I guess I could technically feed myself,” she mumbles, so Regina offers her the spoon. Emma just stares at it until she breaks into a soft giggle. “But I won’t.”

“You’re not going to make me do the airplane thing are you? Henry loved it, so I might be an expert at fake spoon plane noises…” Emma’s face lights up. “But that doesn’t mean I want to do it.”

“You can just do it the normal way,” Emma laughs. “But thanks for offering.”

About halfway through the bowl, Emma gets impatient and takes over for herself. She gives Regina a few spoonfuls even though she has her own bowl (“ _ It’s only fair,” Emma shrugs _ ), and they make sure Bug has had his fair share of the rabbit before gravitating back into each other’s arms.

“Do you think Bug could catch another rabbit? Or something?” Emma asks. 

“It’s worth a try. I can go out with him later, but I don’t want to leave you here yet.” Emma opens her mouth to protest, but Regina shakes her head. “I want to make sure you’re good to walk. Just in case something happens.”

“That’s fair,” Emma agrees. 

It takes a few tries, but eventually Emma is back on her feet. At first she limps around with Regina’s support, but eventually she let’s go and hobbles off on her own. “How’s your leg feel?”

“It’s fine,” Emma shrugs, turning her head away as if to say that it’s anything but  _ fine _ .

“Emma, hey,” Regina says, walking over to her, resting her hands on Emma’s shoulders. “Recovery takes time. You’re going to be fine, alright? I’ve been treating it as well as I can, so for now you just have to be patient. Time will have to do the rest.”

“Or proper medicine,” Emma mumbles. 

“You’re right,” Regina nods. “We’ll get there, okay? We found this cabin, so there has to be something else nearby. In the meantime, if you need another crutch, I can find you something when Bug and I go out for firewood.”

“And rabbits,” Emma reminds her.

“And rabbits, yes.” She helps walk Emma back to the bed before getting her the canteen of water and their bag of supplies, making sure it’s close enough that she won’t have to stand up. “Speaking of which, it’s going to be dark soon. I don’t want to miss our chance. I’ll be back, okay?”

“Okay,” Emma nods, smiling up at Regina, taking her hand for just a moment. 

Regina returns the grin, and their fingers stay connected until they can no longer reach. “Come on, Bug!” Regina calls. The dog jumps up and runs to the front door while Regina gets bundled back up in her layers. “Just call for me if you need anything, okay? I won’t go far.”

The first thing Regina does is find a stick long and sturdy enough for Emma to use when they have to travel next, before cutting up some wood for the fire. She’s not as good with an axe as she is with a scalpel, but she manages well enough to cut them enough to last a few more days in case they need it. 

Meanwhile, Bug is smelling everything and catching nothing. Regina calls for him and he runs to her with no hesitation. “Alright, Bug. It’s your time to shine, alright? Think you can catch us another rabbit?”

Bug barks dutifully, and Regina smiles at him, giving him a quick pat on the head. “Good, boy! Go get ‘em!” He runs off like he’s going after something before stopping and crouching down, like he’s looking for his target. Regina’s surprised when she actually sees Bug looking at a rabbit underneath a bush, and she’s even more surprised when he lunges for it.

Unfortunately, he tries to play with it instead of catch it, and the rabbit burrows back down into the ground. Bug turns back to Regina with a puppy smile on his face. “Bug, no! You’re supposed to kill it!” She shakes her head and turns to gather more edible plants, turning every so often to see the dog barking squirrels up trees or chasing rabbits into the ground.

It’s cute but ultimately serves no purpose. 

She calls Bug back over, trying to give him a pep talk about hunting, but he just knocks his head against her hand as if asking for pets. Regina relents and does so, but she doesn’t cease her pep talk. “You’ve got one more chance, okay? Let’s make Emma proud.”

This time, Bug actually seems to try, he chases the rabbit and leaps at it, but it jumps away at the last minute before making another burrow. He looks over at Regina with sad defeated eyes, and Regina smiles at him. “Come on, boy. It’s alright. Can’t win them all,” she shrugs, leading them back inside, grabbing Emma’s new walking stick before opening the door.

She sets everything down before walking back into the living room, and she’s about to give Emma a proper greeting when she looks up to see the blonde jump, startled at her presence. Emma scrambles like she’s trying to hide something, and it takes Regina a moment to figure out that she’s looking at  _ her _ picture.

Regina’s across the room in seconds, snatching it from Emma, and turning away, her eyes on the photograph of the woman and the little boy. Henry and-- 

The damage is already done, but that doesn’t stop her from going off. “Why were you looking at this? How did you even--” She cuts herself off, afraid of the way her own voice sounds, cold and hollow, and she clears her throat. “These pictures… These are private. You shouldn’t be looking at them.”

The room is silent for a long moment, Regina keeping her back to Emma, who she’s sure is stunned. She doesn’t shift or move or say anything, and it’s when Regina’s about to turn around that Emma finally speaks, “Regina, I-- I didn’t mean--”

Regina spins around, her voice raising as she interrupts her. “To invade my privacy? To look through my things? To cross a line? I trusted you, Emma, and you…” She brings her free hand to her eyes, hiding her tears behind it, and as they spill, her anger seems to dissipate. “You don’t understand,” she finishes, sounding more broken than she wants to.

There’s no point in hiding anything anymore, and she makes her way to the bed where she sits next to Emma, still crying into her hand until the other woman pulls it away, lacing their fingers together as she drops them to the mattress between them. With her other hand she takes the picture back and slides it back into Regina’s wallet before putting it away completely. “We don’t have to talk about it,” she says softly. “I’m sorry for looking.”

Regina doesn’t answer her. She resumes her former position with her free hand. She keeps the one enjoined with Emma’s where it is, letting herself be calmed by the gentle strokes the other woman is making with her thumb.

It’s such a gentle and non invasive action that Regina feels worse about yelling at the other woman, and she ends up leaning against Emma’s shoulder, bringing her other hand to rest gently against her neck. Emma readjusts to the position, unlinking their hands so that she can hold Regina while she cries.

It’s a while before she feels like she can say anything about it, but eventually she pulls away, and reaches to take the picture back out. Emma watches with curious eyes as Regina hands her the picture. “You probably guessed that’s Henry,” Regina starts. She closes her eyes, taking a deep breath before admitting, “He’s with my sister.” 

There’s a few beats of silence before Emma asks, “Your  _ sister _ ? I thought…” 

“You thought she was my partner didn’t you?” Regina asks with a teary laugh. She glances back at the blonde whose eyes are on the picture, stunned. 

“Sorry, it’s just… Well, she doesn’t look like you.” 

“She’s my half sister. We shared a mother.”

“What… what happened?” Emma’s voice is hesitant as she sets the picture out of harm’s way and turns back to Regina. “If you don’t want to talk about it, that’s fine, but if you do...you know I’m here for you.”

“I know,” the brunette smiles at her, even wider when Emma takes her hands again, and she takes a minute to regroup before talking. “Her name was Zelena. We grew up together, and she was always my best friend, even when we fought. She was so kind, at least to me. If anyone picked on me at school, she had my back. She was one of my references for Henry’s adoption.” Regina smiles at the nostalgia. “She deserved the world, but of course, the people that deserve the most always seem to get the least.

“It was almost two years ago when she found out she had cancer,” Regina says, her tears starting to form again. “It was heart cancer. Go figure, with me being a heart surgeon… But this was something I couldn’t fix. It was found in a late stage, so the tumor had already done most of its damage. After that she didn’t have much time.” She pauses to let out a bitter laugh. “If love was an element in the human heart,  _ literally _ , as people wish to believe it is, I never would have lost her.” 

Regina breaks then, leaning back to Emma’s shoulder, and the blonde accepts her with open arms, pulling her hat off to run her fingers in the woman’s dark hair. “Regina, I am so sorry.”

She wants to tell her  _ it’s okay _ , but it isn’t. She wants to stop crying and move on, but she can’t. So she grips Emma closer and lets herself be held in the woman’s embrace and calmed by the soft motions to her scalp until she feels strong enough to pull away, though not by much.

“Henry loved her too,” she continues as she wipes the tears from her eyes. “She was the biggest person in his life aside from me. He never had another parent. I’ve always been a single mom.” 

“Why?” 

Regina shrugs, laughing as though it would make her feel better facing the truth. “I’m just better off alone.” 

The other woman looks at her for a long time, her expression unreadable but her gaze steady and alluring, so much that Regina couldn’t tear her eyes away even if she wanted to. When Emma’s hands thread through her hair until her hand is gently cupped at the base of the brunette’s head, Regina can’t help but lean in, and when Emma closes the distance between them in one swift moment, sending their lips crashing together, Regina can’t help but reciprocate the kiss, turning her whole body toward Emma and pulling the other woman closer to her, one arm looped around her waist.

Emma moves her hands to zip off Regina’s coat and pull it from her shoulders. The brunette tosses it across the room while Emma unwraps the scarf, and together they start on the next layer, their lips never leaving the others.

When Regina is down to as few layers as Emma is, as little as she’s had on their whole journey, Emma pulls away, her eyes wide and unsure and beautiful, and Regina smiles at her. “It’s okay,” she reassures, hesitating only slightly before the admission, “I want you.”

It’s all she needs to say for Emma to reach back for her desperately, pulling them even closer than before. They tug at each other’s clothing until it’s gone, suck at each other’s skin until it’s a pink, and explore each other’s bodies until Emma moans. 

“Regina, please.”

At that, Regina pushes Emma back, as gently as possible before she straddles her, hovering just enough so that her own body isn’t in the way of her feeling Emma’s, and she kisses her way across her jawline and down her neck as her fingers trace a line from her collarbone, over her sternum, past her stomach, and to her center. She watches as Emma unravels at her touch, clutching at Regina’s arms as her back arches, and it isn’t long until she’s crying out Regina’s name and bringing her down just to lift her back up again, her fingers dancing over Regina’s skin.

Emma is so careful with her, taking her time in pressing soft kisses across Regina’s shoulders and down her chest, her hands stroking invisible lines up and down her thighs, and she readjusts the two of them so that Regina is on her back, Emma next to her, propped up on an elbow, her hand tangled in Regina’s hair.

When she kisses her again, it’s soft, like she’s memorizing the way Regina’s lips feel on hers, like it’s something she’s been dreaming about for months even though they’ve only known each other for weeks, and when she touches her, Regina feels her whole body burning, like Emma is everything she’s ever needed but has just now found. 

Regina reaches for Emma, already desperate to touch her again, and when she does and they’re both losing themselves in the feel of the other, they sigh against each other’s lips before letting the moment take them over, each of them desperate to make the other feel good and beautiful and  _ wanted _ until finally they’re both coming together, grasping for eachother, gasping the other’s name until they’re out of breath.

Emma buries her head in the crook of Regina’s neck as she pulls her closer, and Regina reaches for the blankets to cover them before she kisses the side of Emma’s head, her hands stroking the soft expanse of Emma’s skin, not wanting to ever let go. With their naked bodies tangled up together, their faces close, they drift off to sleep.

When Regina wakes up, the first thing she sees when she opens her eyes is Emma sleeping soundly next to her, one hand under the pillow, the other on the mattress between them. Her face is half hidden by the pillow, but it’s adorable, the way she’s tucked away. She breathes lightly, sounding as relaxed as she looks, and the only two things Regina can think are about how beautiful the blonde next to her is and how timeless this moment is.

She doesn’t think anything of it when she carefully sits up to reach for Emma’s camera. She’s never worked a film camera before, so she switches it to the automatic setting and hopes for the best as she adjusts to get a good angle, something to capture this moment. 

The shutter sound clicks, but doesn’t stir Emma, and Regina grins as she puts the camera away and slides back down next to Emma, looping her arms around the other woman and bringing their bodies flush against the other.

Emma makes a soft noise of approval as her arms stretch out around Regina, her eyes opening just after her hands find rest on Regina’s bare back. “Hi,” Emma smiles, brushing her nose against Regina’s before bringing their lips together in a soft kiss.

Their lips linger until they’re both smiling against each other, and Regina pulls back. “Hi,” she responds with a grin. Emma’s eyes are so bright, just by the way they’re looking at Regina, glowing like her hair in the sun, and Regina pushes a strand of it behind the other woman’s ear. “You look beautiful,” she mutters.

Emma’s breath catches in her throat. “I’m sure I look like a mess.”

“If you look like a mess, I’d hate to think of what I look like,” Regina laughs, but Emma just smiles.

“Gorgeous.” 

Regina’s heart soars, and for the first time in a long time, it doesn’t feel like just a muscle. It feels full

* * *

 

The next time they wake up, it’s to Emma’s stomach growling. The blonde tries to laugh it off, but since they’re actually still stranded in the middle of nowhere and down to just berries and conifer needles again, the joke doesn’t take.

“We’ve gotta get out of here,” Emma says, a worried look starting to settle in her eyes.

Regina holds her close, relishing the contact while they can still make it. “I know,” she mumbles into Emma’s hair. “If this cabin is here, I think we have a good chance of finding something else. A road or something.”

“You’re right, but I’m kind of worried that the whole point of this cabin was seclusion. Like Thoreau or some shit. What if there’s nothing?”

“I’m sure there’s something,” Regina says, kissing her once more before getting up. “Come on, let’s get dressed.” Emma pouts, “I’m serious, Emma. If we had food or some way to  _ get _ food, I’d say we could wait another day, but we wouldn’t make it.”

“You’re right,” Emma says, finally conceding and reaching for her discarded clothes.

“Do you think you’ll be okay to walk? I found you another stick, by the way. I didn’t get to tell you the other day,” she says, going to grab it from the other room. “Here, try it out.”

Emma laughs. “You’re just preventing me from getting dressed,” she says, mostly dressed from the bed, struggling with her pants. “I might need your help this time.” Regina gives her a disbelieving look. “I’m serious!” the blonde laughs again. “Regina, help!”

The brunette rolls her eyes as she makes her way to Emma, tugging her pants over her ass. “There. Happy?”

Emma shrugs. “I think I liked it better when you were taking them off.”

“I know. Now, here, we need to try this out,” Regina says, helping Emma up and handing her the stick. For a moment, Emma struggles to remain upright, but for the most part, the walking stick is an effective crutch. 

She makes her way into another room where she drops down on a chair, forcing a smile when Regina walks over. “I can manage, but I can’t go very fast.” Emma tears her eyes away, looking defeated and disheartened. 

Regina crouches down, a hand on Emma’s knee as she looks up at her. “That’s okay,” she reassures her. “It’s better than not being able to walk at all.”

“That’s true, but I’ll only slow you down. I think…” Emma closes her eyes. “I think you should go ahead for help, then send it back for me when you find it.”

This takes Regina by surprise. “Emma, I don’t want to leave you here.”

“I know, and I don’t want to be left here, but honestly Regina, at this point, time is against us. Bug and I can stay here, and you go on without us. If you find help, just make sure they know where we are, okay? We’ll be okay here. I can get more berries, and Bug can catch another rabbit. It’s just…” Emma trails off, looking away from Regina again, kicking out her bad leg just a little for emphasis. “It’s just more efficient. I know you’ll make it, but I’m not sure I--”

“Emma, stop. We’re both going to make it. I’m going to get you help.”

“You are?”

Regina nods. “I will. I trust you.”

Emma doesn’t move from the chair the whole time Regina gets ready, layering herself back up and getting everything prepared so that Emma will have to struggle as little as possible while she’s gone, bringing in all the wood she’s cut and gathering as many edible plants as she can before she’s finally ready. “Emma,” she says from the doorway, her voice coming out quieter than she thought it would.

She hears the chair creak as the other woman stands, Emma’s footsteps slowly sounding closer, and it’s too soon that she sees Emma standing in front of her, tear streaks on her face. 

“Be safe, okay?” Emma says before taking Regina’s coat in her hands and bringing them closer together one last time.

Regina melts into the kiss, her hands resting on Emma’s face as she does, holding back a sob when Emma deepens the kiss, her fingers slipping under Regina’s scarf to brush against her neck. “I will be,” Regina mutters as she pulls back, going in for another chaste kiss. “I’ll be back for you, Emma. I promise.”

Emma nods but otherwise doesn’t respond, and Regina has to turn and walk through the door before she breaks down in front of the other woman. She manages to keep her composure until she’s taken ten steps. She counted those and she counts the next ten. The numbers distract her from everything she’s leaving behind.

It doesn’t work for the next ten steps though, as Regina’s mind drifts back to everything that’s happened over the week and a half, about how ever since she chased Emma down, she decided that this was about more than living. It was a matter of  _ saving _ . It was putting her own fears aside to protect Emma, and she’d struggled with that at first, but somewhere between there and the ravine, between the ravine and the cabin, between walking out the door and taking these thirty-something steps away, everything had changed.

This decision was made with the idea that all of this is about  _ survival _ and about living, but to Regina, the choice should have been about what everything else is about. 

_ Emma _ .

She’s running back to the cabin before she gets to logic, tossing it all aside because the only thing that matters is making sure all three of them make it out of this alive and  _ together _ .

When she runs through the door, she finds Emma curled up on the bed, her face buried in the pillow, but she looks up when she hears Regina crash through it, dashing over to her, and reaching to comfort her before she’s even on the ground next to her. “Regina, what-- I thought--”

“Emma, I’m not leaving you here. I don’t give a damn if you slow me down, okay? I want you by my side.” Regina says, pulling off her gloves to wipe the tears from Emma’s cheeks. “We decided already that we’re stronger together. We’re finishing this journey  _ together _ . We’re finding help  _ together _ .”

For a moment, Emma doesn’t react, other than staring at Regina in shock, but then she nods. “Together.”

* * *

 

It’s a rough start.

Emma’s grateful that she gets to be a part of the journey, even though she doubts the decision with every step she makes, but Regina reassures her constantly. She holds her hand and helps guide her with more ease, gives her reminders that they’re better as a team, and she  _ smiles _ , which Emma believes provides more support her than the crutch in her hand.

They’re headed in the direction they would have kept heading in had Regina not found the cabin, and at this point, they’re both holding out for blind optimism, though neither are really sure they believe it anymore.

Emma just focuses on Regina the whole time, and that’s enough for now.

But then it’s been hours, and they’re both out of breath. Bug stops to look at back at them before he runs over to them, nudging Regina’s hand, and that’s when she finally says, “We need to take a break.”

The find a log to sit down on, and Regina makes sure Emma is comfortable before taking the spot next to her. The blonde doesn’t hesitate before leaning over to rest her head against Regina’s shoulder, and she smiles when she feels Regina’s head knock gently against hers, her hand reaching for Emma’s.

“I’m glad you came back for me,” Emma admits after a long silence. “I missed you.”

Regina laughs, “I was only gone for a minute.”

“Two,” Emma corrects. “And even so. I missed you,” she sighs. She doesn’t give any more thought than she has to about the whole thing between them. She can’t go there, but she nuzzles more against Regina, loving how safe she feels with the other woman by her side.

She’s about to say something else when Bug suddenly starts barking, running off in another direction, and Emma is immediately on alert. “Regina, what if it’s another bear?” 

“I’m sure it’s not, but I’ll go check it out if it’ll make you feel better.”

“Please?” Emma asks, worried out of her mind. Regina nods and stands up, calling out to Bug as she walks in his direction through the snow. Emma watches her go before she turns back to look around them for the first time since sitting down. 

Everything is more or less the same. Lots of trees and snow, some mountains in the distance, but there’s something a little bit closer that catches her eye. She squints and she sees smoke, puffing up from a smoke stack. Her jaw drops as she pulls out her camera, refusing to take her eyes from the smoke.  She stands to get a better view and peers through the viewfinder, zooming in to get a better look.

It’s a plant of some kind. A plant that’s actively running. She can’t see much, but she sees enough to identify a forklift in operation, which could only mean that there are people there to operate it. 

“Regina!” she shouts, turning to shout again even louder. “Regina! I found something!”

“I’ll be right there!” She hears Regina’s footsteps making their way back to her, and sees Bug running over to her, but the minute she turns her head to look back at the factory, Regina screams, loud and pained and Emma’s heart drops to her stomach. 

Putting all pain aside, she runs through the trees towards Regina, Bug just ahead of her as if showing her the way. “Regina!” she shouts as she runs closer, but she doesn’t need to shout again when runs around a tree and sees Regina in the ground, grimacing.

She looks up at Emma, tears in her eyes before looking back down her leg, and that’s when Emma noticed the bear trap closed around Regina’s boot. Emma drops to the ground in seconds, trying to tug the ends apart to free the other woman, but it’s no use, and it just causes Regina even more pain. 

“I’m sorry,” Regina chokes out.

Emma looks up at her shaking her head, “Don’t you dare be sorry, Regina, not for anything. I’m going to get help.” 

Regina looks away in tears, “It’s hopeless.”

“No. It’s not, Regina. I--”

“Emma, please. I’ve accepted it. That this is it. You still have a chance, so--”

“Stop!” Emma cries out through tears. “You can’t talk like that. We’re not letting each other die out here, remember? I don’t know if we promised that, but I’m promising it now,” she says, linking her pinky with Regina’s. “See? It’s official.”

“But--”

“No buts,” Emma says, regaining composure. “There’s a factory. A plant or something not too far away. I saw it, okay? I’m going to go there and find help for us. We’re going to live. I  _ promise _ .”

She sees the hope flicker in Regina’s eyes, and she smiles, just to let it grow some more. “Go,” Regina tells her. Emma nods and leans in pressing her lips to Regina’s one last time. “Be safe.”

“I’ll be back for you.”

Bug stays with Regina while Emma starts her trek to the factory, really alone for the first time. When she’d left Regina behind the last time on the plane, she’d had Bug with her, but this time, she not only has no company, she also has a pain in her chest at the idea of going on without the other woman.  _ Is this what Regina felt like when she left the cabin _ ?

The feeling stings, but it drives her forward. 

If she can’t make it to the plant, there’s no hope for any of them. 

So she limps on, fighting the pain and fighting her exhaustion. In the distance, she can tell the sun is already lowering, though not by much. She can’t stop, not even for a minute, if she wants to get there before they’re finished with work for the day.

Each step is harder to take, and when she makes it into a clearing, the sun beats down, and even though it’s cold, the direct sunlight is making her lightheaded. But she can make out the bricks in the smokestack, she can hear the machinery, and she pushes forward.

When she steps onto ground that’s not covered by snow, ground that’s sturdy and the factory’s property is the only thing left to cross, she staggers, so close she can almost feel it, and she wants to sprint across the concrete, but she can hardly stand,

She starts shouting for help the minute she suspects she might not make it, but she doubts her voice can be heard over the machinery. She keeps crying out anyways, just in case. 

The forklift is only meters away, and she makes her way towards it, not even caring that going so close to such heavy equipment provides its own dangers. All she can think about it the person using it. 

When she hears it shut down, and a man shouting, she starts to say the words in her head.  _ Regina and Bug. We need to save them too. Regina and Bug. Regina and Bug. _ “Regina and Bug,” she says, as soon as she sees the man in front of her, just as she collapses. He catches her. “They’re out there too. Regina and Bug. Make sure they get help.” 

“We’ll find them,” is the last thing she hears before she blacks out.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> forgive me (for zelena)


	7. Chapter 7

There’s beeping. It’s too mechanical to be in the middle of nowhere but not soft enough to be a sound from some kind of afterlife, if that even exists, and it’s so familiar, that Regina’s sure she’s just dreaming of being back at work, surrounded by hospital machinery. She listens closer before she decides it’s definitely what she’s hearing, but it’s not until she thinks she might be able to open her eyes that she realizes that this isn’t a dream.

It’s odd being on this end of things at the hospital, lying in the bed wearing a hospital gown instead of walking through the halls wearing scrubs, and at first that’s all she’s confused about, but all it takes is a nurse walking in to check in on her that everything clicks.

“Dr. Mills?”

“Where’s Emma?” She’s sitting up in bed even though the nurse is telling her to relax, but she can’t feel any kind of relief about being rescued until she knows that Emma’s made it too. “Is she okay?”

The nurse stares at her for a moment, surprised by Regina’s reaction, having just woken up. “You don’t want me to go over your chart with you?”

“No!” Regina snaps. “I mean,  _ yes _ , I would appreciate that, but I need you to tell me where Emma is. Is she safe? Is she okay?”

“She’s fine, Dr. Mills. After we go over everything, I can tell you what room she’s in. You shouldn’t be walking around quite yet, but I’ll pretend I don’t know anything,” she says with a polite nod.

“Thanks,” Regina says, finally leaning back in the bed, eager for the nurse to go over her injuries so she can get down to Emma’s room, assuming she can get there. 

She ends up taking the chart away from the nurse to read it herself, skimming over it and then asking for the room number only moments after. “I know it’s policy for you to go over all of this, but there’s no point if I already know what it all means. Can this be another thing you just pretend?”

The nurse hesitates, but nods. “Miss Swan’s room is just down the hall. Room 614. Will you need crutches?”

“No,” Regina says, nearly cutting the nurse off. “No, I’ll be fine.” She waits until the nurse has left the room before throwing the covers back and swinging her legs over the bed. Her injuries aren’t as bad as they could be, most of them curable by rest and fluids, which she’s sure she’s had plenty of by now.

The records stated that she’d been admitted to the hospital nearly two days ago, and she’d been unconscious on arrival. Her most prominent injury was the leg she’d had caught in the bear trap, which was braced and bandaged heavily, but nothing was broken. She’d been extremely lucky.

She’s careful when she eases herself out of bed, careful to only put her weight on her good leg before limping forward to gauge the other leg’s use, her hand still on the hospital bed in case something goes wrong. Walking isn’t the most comfortable thing, but it’s manageable, and she wastes no time in hobbling down the hallway towards Emma’s room.

The door’s closed, but when she peeks into the window, she sees Emma, sitting up in the bed, awake and alive. She pushes the door open without a second thought, and when Emma’s eyes land on her she beams. “Regina.”

Regina smiles back, and moves as quickly as she can to Emma’s side. The blonde sits up more and opens her arms for Regina, who all but falls into them, perching herself on the edge of the bed as she returns the other woman’s embrace. 

She pulls back to meet Emma’s eyes, her hand resting against the blonde’s cheek. “You did it, Emma. You saved us.”

“You saved  _ me _ ,” Emma says, her voice carefree and soft. “Of course I saved you. A promise is a promise you know,” she grins, looping her pinky with Regina’s, just as she had before. 

The brunette smiles down at their fingers before looking up at Emma. She looks wholesome, after two days of recovery, and even two days ago, Regina thought she was beautiful, but now she’s beautiful and so much _brighter_. She catches Emma’s eyes drifting to her lips, and Regina wonders if this promise they’re making now is a new one, something unspoken and just as strong as _I’ll save you_ and _we’re stronger together_. She’s about to lean in and close the distance between them when the door creaks open behind her, and Emma jerks back.

“Hello,” a voice says, wary and unsure, and Regina turns to see a man with dark hair, relatively clean cut, clad in a leather jacket walking towards them. Regina clears her throat and turns to stand back up, limping out of the man’s way as he takes her spot next to Emma.

The atmosphere of the room has shifted so drastically from where it had been only a moment ago, and Regina moves to position herself somewhere next to the man. Both his hands are now holding Emma’s, and the other woman refuses to meet her eyes.

“You must be Killian,” Regina finally manages to say, holding out her hand to greet him. He gives it a look before taking it in his own and giving it one hard shake.

“Yeah, Emma’s fiancé.”

Regina nods, unsure of what she should say next. How long has be been here? Does he already know who she is? She’s about to introduce herself when Emma does it for her in a quiet voice. “Killian, this is Regina.”

He looks her way before nodding and turning his attention back to Emma. “I’ve heard a lot about you,” Regina tries, hoping that’ll make up for the fact that she was about to kiss his fiancée only minutes ago, and well… everything else. Emma looks at her finally, her eyes wide, and Regina knows she’s asking her to not say anything. So she forces a smile before Emma’s eyes glance back out the window.

“Thanks for everything,” Killian says to her, and Regina nods but doesn’t say anything else. Killian has adjusted himself on the bed to wrap an arm possessively around Emma, and when he gives the brunette a forced grin, the message is clear, The conversation is over, and it’s time for her to leave. 

She nods and starts to back up, just before Emma speaks up, her voice still small, but a little louder than the last time. “Regina, thanks again. I mean it.” 

“No, Emma. I--”

“You need some more rest?” Killian suddenly asks, interrupting Regina as he turns to look at the blonde, kissing the side of her head. Regina wants to believe he means well, but he doesn’t have to be so rude to make his point.

Emma looks down without answering, leaning back against the pillow submissively, and Regina frowns because that’s  _ not Emma _ . The Emma she knows would never do that. But then she smiles up at Killian, and it looks real. Regina turns and leaves the room before Emma can look back at her.

The first tear escapes the minute the door closes behind her, but she fights the rest off as she makes her way back down the hall. The space between their rooms is minimal, but the walk back to 610 feels even further than it had when she left it. 

She’s sure more than a handful of people are staring at her as she limps past them, but she refuses to meet anyone’s eyes, especially not when her own are slowly filling with tears. They fall when the door to her room closes behind her, and she falls to the bed, turning away from the door so she can avoid talking to anyone who comes in, though she’s sure the only people she has to worry about are doctors and nurses.

It’s ridiculous that she’s crying so much, she tries to tell herself. There’s no reason for it at all, but when she thinks back to Emma’s smile and the way she would hold Regina in her arms, the way she looked at Regina just before Killian walked in, she no longer has it in her to convince herself of anything but the truth.

She’s in love with Emma.

But she doesn’t dwell on it when Emma checks out from the hospital, stopping by Regina’s room to say goodbye and exchange numbers. She doesn’t dwell on it when she holds Emma there in her arms for the last time or when she sees Killian hovering outside Regina’s room waiting on his fiancée. She doesn’t dwell on it when she leaves later that night and picks up Bug from the vet before heading home.

She’s lost count of the days since she last saw Henry, but when he runs into her arms the second she gets home, it puts a smile on her face, only the second time since she last saw Emma. She cries into his bear pajamas as she lifts him up in her arms and asks him how his tee-ball game went. 

Her son excitedly tells her about how good a job he did and how he can’t wait for her to see next time. “I wouldn’t miss it for the world,” she tells him.

He grins at her and she gasps when she notices he lost a tooth. “Grandpa helped me pull it out! Then he bought me ice cream.”

“You must have been so brave,” she says, smiling wide at him through her tears. He nods and hugs her again, but when he spots Bug waiting patiently over Regina’s shoulder, he wiggles his way out to run to the dog.

“Mama!” he exclaims, pointing at Bug, who licks his outstretched finger. “Is he ours?”

Henry already has his arms around Bug, holding him tight before Regina can answer. She looks down, swallowing hard, trying not to think about how much she thinks Bug should have been Emma’s, and nods at her son. “Yes. His name is Bug.”

The little boy laughs. “He’s got a silly name.”

“He’s a silly dog,” Regina grins. “It suits him.”

Henry is ecstatic about the new addition to their family, insisting on feeding Bug for every meal, and of course, Bug loves the attention. She makes him a dog door so he can go into the backyard when he’d like, as he doesn’t like being cooped up, but he spends most nights indoors, sleeping dutifully next to Regina, waking her up by nudging his wet nose against her hand when she has nightmares like he can tell when she isn’t okay.

The dog’s attitude frequently reminds her of Emma, but she hasn’t tried to contact the blonde since leaving the hospital. A few times she’s snapped a few pictures of Bug, one of Bug and Henry, and has been about to send them to Emma, but every time, she stops herself, thinking it would be best not to make contact at all.

The first call from Emma comes about a week after Regina makes it home. She stares at it for a long time until the call ends, and even then, she picks up her phone, about to call the woman back until she shakes her head, putting her phone back down. 

In the weeks that follow, she receives a few more calls, never two within the same week, but she doesn’t answer any of them. She shouldn’t get involved, especially when Emma is engaged, maybe even married by now, and Regina can’t seem to let her feelings go. 

Instead she focuses as much of her time as she can on Henry and on work, but nothing goes back to the way it was before. She freezes up more at work and gets tremors in her hands and doesn’t want to get on a plane to travel, and she has to step down from performing surgeries, but everyone seems to agree it’s for the best. 

She starts working with trainees instead and takes some time off, working only the hours when Henry is at school. She starts helping out with his tee-ball team more, offering to help coach while Bug becomes their official mascot. 

Henry gets signed up for cub scouts, and all he can talk about is how he can’t wait to be a Bear Cub when he’s in third grade. Regina smiles at him and asks if he learned any new facts about bears while she was gone, and he surprises her by asking if she saw any bears on her  _ adventure _ , as he calls it.

Regina tries to keep a steady smile as she nods at him, “We did. It was a black bear.” 

Henry squeals in delight. “What happened? Was he big?”

“He was. Bug wanted to play with him, but the bear didn’t understand, so he tried to hurt him and Emma.” Henry’s eyes go wide. “But luckily, a smart little boy once told me how to identify bears and how to handle seeing them in the wild.”

“So you saved them?” Henry asks.

“I did.”

“You’re a superhero, Mom,” Henry beams, and Regina smiles back, remembering the last person that called her that, after she carried Emma to the cabin. She tries to hold it together when a tear falls, taking a deep breath as she does anything she can to stop the rest from forming. Henry notices anyway. “Mom?”

The worry in his soft voice is enough to break down all Regina’s efforts to stop crying, and within minutes, she’s a mess on the living room floor. Henry drops the toy he was holding and walks over to her before curling himself up in her lap, his little arms clinging to her. 

Bug runs over to them, lying down next to Regina, his head resting on her leg, and the woman wraps an arm around her son and sets her hand against Bug’s head, letting herself fall apart, and willing herself not to think about Emma.

* * *

 

When Emma gets home, she’s grateful. By the time she’s walking through the door, she’s okay enough to not need help, and she feels healthier. She’s hydrated and has been able to eat and use a proper toilet for the first time in what feels like forever, but somehow, she doesn’t exactly feel  _ better _ . 

Everything is different all of a sudden. Her home doesn’t feel quite as comfortable as she remembered it to be, and Killian is there for her in all the ways a fiancé (or is he just her boyfriend now?) should be, but nothing about it is what she thinks she needs. 

He throws her a welcome home party, which is  _ thoughtful _ , but it’s not like Emma was away on a trip. She was literally stranded in the mountains fighting for her life. She dresses up for it though and lets her arm loop through Killian’s as they greet their guests together.

When he wanders off, Emma feels equal parts relieved and uneasy, and she does what she can to dodge everyone in attendance. It’s mostly Killian’s friends and coworkers and the few friends she has, but she’s not excited to see anyone.

She’s even less excited when they approach her with comments such as: “You look great! You know, all things considered,” or “Wow, I can’t even tell you were gone that long,” or “I bet you missed showering a lot, didn’t you?” or her personal favorite, “You must have been eating so healthy! All natural and everything.”

It’s hard, but she smiles politely and makes small talk, carefully avoiding having to talk about her experience with these people who just  _ can’t _ understand. They mean well, she’s sure of it but listening to them glamorizing her near death experience eventually gets to be too much, and she ducks upstairs when no one is looking.

It’s the first time she calls Regina. 

She wants to talk to someone who understands, even if they aren’t talking about the ordeal, not to mention, she misses the other woman. She thinks about her more than a normal amount, and specifically the moment where Regina ran into her hospital room, hardly able to walk, holding her in her arms like she was precious and still in need of protection.

When Killian had seen her, he had run to her too, but when he pulled her close it felt different, as if he was trying to make up for her absence in his own life, rather than expressing any actual feeling over almost losing her. She’d managed to wiggle away, telling him she needed the space and convincing herself in that moment that she would likely be apprehensive to touch for months.

Of course, that had been thoroughly disproved once she was in Regina’s arms.

Regina doesn’t answer the first phone call, and Emma doesn’t try again, figuring the other woman is busy with her own life, taking care of Henry and getting back into work, but when she calls a week later, Regina still doesn’t answer. 

She makes a few calls here and there, but is careful about the space between them, not wanting to seem too desperate even though desperation is most of what she feels at this point.

Killian starts to notice her distance, and the way she sleeps on the edge of the bed, not wanting to lie right next to him. When he puts his arm around her on the couch, she’ll stand up and walk away. If he tries to kiss her in public, she’ll turn her head, leaving him to kiss her cheek instead.

“What’s gotten into you, Emma?” he asks.

She shrugs. It’s been months since she’s been back, and everyone, including herself, expects her to be back to normal, to the person she was before, but the fact of the matter is that that person doesn’t exist anymore.

She looks up at Killian and forces a smile. He looks worried, but Emma’s not sure if that worry is for her, or for their relationship. “You know I love you right?” Emma nods once but doesn’t meet his eye. “I know that what happened was hard on you, and even if it’s left you broken… I still love you.”

He pulls her into his arms and the only thought on her mind is that Regina wouldn’t think she was broken.

That night she tries calling Regina again, and when she hears the automated response telling her to leave a voicemail, she doesn’t hang up this time.

There’s a long moment of silence after the beep, and Emma freezes up. She debates hanging up, but it’s too late for that so she takes a deep breath, and when she finally says Regina’s name, it feels like she’s taken another. “Regina, I hope you’re okay. I’ve been thinking about you a lot lately, and about Bug, and Henry. I just hope everything’s going okay.” She swallows hard, starting to tear up, and she decides to end the voicemail before she starts sobbing on the other end, but when she says “I--” she has to catch herself.

[ _ I love you _ .]

“I miss you.”

She hangs up the phone and drops it onto the mattress. She’s crying as she turns towards the bathroom and is sobbing by the time she steps into the shower. 

The words echo through her mind like an outro that suddenly makes sense of the whole song, begging you to replay it, and that’s just what she does. She thinks back to the moments with Regina where she felt safe and content despite their circumstances. She thinks back to Regina’s eyes, effulgent when they looked at her, Regina’s skin on hers, her fingers gentle as they touched Emma in all the right ways, and in this moment it’s clearer than ever what Emma’s been denying all this time.

She’s in love with Regina.

A week later. Killian goes away for work, and she takes advantage of his absence and goes through her things from the crash, still stuffed in the back of a closet. Most things are heavily damaged or ruined, so she tosses almost everything, except of course for her camera, which has gone untouched ever since her return. The roll of film has been used up, so she winds it back up and walks into her dark room to start developing. 

The whole experience is therapeutic. The room is still, which is something she’s still getting used to, but here, she doesn’t mind it this time. Her mind is clear throughout the process, and she tries to focus more on developing her pictures than what her pictures are of.

She doesn’t let herself get a clear view of any of them until they’re all completely ready, and when she flips the lights on, she walks around the room, starting at the first few pictures. There’s some of the eclipse that she hadn’t developed yet, but then she gets to the first one from the plane, a bird’s eye view of the unforgiving landscape that threatened to defeat them.

Next to those, there’s one of Neal flying, and it unnerves her to think that this was the last picture of him ever taken. He’s smiling, Bug peering up at him in the corner of the photograph, and Emma makes a note to send the picture to Neal’s father.

A few more pictures are taken from the plane, and then a couple on the ground, but there’s one that makes Emma’s heart skip a beat. It’s the shot she took of Regina standing on the precipice, gazing out at the view, her hair blowing in the wind. Next to that picture is Regina and Bug together, but the last one is by far Emma’s favorite. In the third one, Regina is turned, looking at the blonde, with a smile that Emma still thinks is more radiant than the view. 

She remembers the next few pictures so clearly. Bug snoozing inside the plane, a few more nature shots, but the last picture is new. She stops in her tracks as she takes it down to get a better look. 

It’s a picture of her, sleeping soundly in the cabin, and the shot itself is good, but the only thing about it on Emma’s mind is that Regina took this. She doesn’t know why, but she can imagine that night like it was yesterday, the two of them intertwined as if they were always meant to be, Regina’s lips soft against hers, and even though she was asleep for this moment, she can imagine Regina waking up, smiling at Emma, wanting to capture the moment because it was  _ perfect _ .

_ They _ were perfect.


	8. Chapter 8

It’s been months, and Regina’s been dodging all of Emma’s calls and feeling guilty for missing every single one of them. With each one she’s left feeling like she  _ needs _ to answer. Like something important is going on, but at the same time, it feels like she’s putting more space there.  _ It’s healthy _ , she tells herself.

One day, she’s walking Bug with Henry, and her son squeals when he sees the mailman pulling away from their mailbox. “Can I get the mail?”

Regina laughs, “Sure.” She lets go of Henry’s hand so he can run ahead for it, Bug on his heels, and by the time he’s pulled out a large envelope, she’s caught up.

Henry examines it, reading Regina’s name out loud before passing it to her with wide eyes. “It’s for you, Mom.” He reaches back in for the rest of the mail and closes the door before the three of them make their way inside.

Her son is extremely curious about the large envelope, but Regina waits until Henry’s gone to bed to open it. She knows it’s from Emma. The other woman’s name is in the top corner, along with the return address, and she isn’t sure what’s in the envelope, but if her guess is right, she’s going to end up crying.

So she closes herself into her study, pours herself a drink and settles in, preparing herself to see what Emma sent her.

The first picture she sees is Bug, wandering through the snow, and it affects her more deeply than she thought it would. By the looks of it, this photograph was from Emma’s first solo journey, leaving Regina behind on the plane. 

She can see why Emma chose to send it, Bug smiling triumphantly mid jump, and the mountains behind him are breathtaking. The next one is a shot of trees, and she recognizes it as the area near the cave they spent a couple of nights in.

Regina can tell there’s one more picture, and she’s expecting it to be the one she took of Emma sleeping in the cabin, but she’s surprised when it’s not a picure of Emma, but of herself, standing at an overlook, smiling bright back at Emma, and for a moment she imagines the picture as the way Emma sees her. There’s a little post it in the corner where Emma has scribbled, “beauty… and then there’s the view.”

Reading that note is the moment when Regina breaks.

She finishes her drink and picks up her phone to go to Emma’s contact, her finger hovering over the little green button. She should call Emma. She  _ needs _ to call Emma. She needs to talk to her, to hear her voice and her laugh. She needs to make plans to see her, that smile and those bright green eyes, but then she remembers Killian and she powers her phone off, opting to go to sleep instead.

Regina dreams of Emma that night, of falling asleep in her arms and waking up next to her the same way she did in the cabin. She dreams of Emma smiling at her as soon as her eyes open as she leans in for a kiss. She dreams of tangling her hands into Emma’s hair as she pulls her closer, tugging gently on her lip as the blonde’s fingers trail down her body. She dreams of whimpering at Emma’s touch and crying out her name.

She wakes up still thinking of Emma, an ache in her chest.

* * *

 

Henry’s last tee-ball game of the season is today, and Regina’s up bright and early to get him ready, pushing back thoughts of Emma as she cooks him breakfast. 

Ever since receiving the pictures a week ago, Regina’s been dreaming of Emma every night, missing her more and more each day, but she’s still trying to convince herself to stay away. Somewhere in her, she knows that it’s only a matter of time before she caves, and she’s already unconsciously decided that the next time Emma calls, she’s going to answer, even if she won’t admit it to herself.

“Come on, Henry. Are you ready?” He nods before yelling outside for Bug, who races through the house towards the front door. Henry isn’t far behind, and Regina smiles at their enthusiasm.

Usually they just walk to the field, as it isn’t too far from their home, so they head out and before long they’ve arrived and Henry runs to all his friends in the dugout with Bug, while Regina goes to talk to the other coaches, and meet the other team’s coaches.

When the game starts, Regina turns to the crowd and smiles when she sees her father. He gives her a wave and a big smile, and she turns to Henry, “Wave to, Grandpa!” and as he does so, her eyes skim over the rest of the people filling the bleachers. 

Most of the faces are the same as always, parents and families coming to support their kids, but one person in particular catches her eye, sitting alone and nervously looking at her feet instead of at the game. Her face is hidden, but when she looks out at the field, Regina gasps.

It’s Emma.

She spins around on the spot as if to hide, though the woman is bound to see her sometime, since she’s out on the field coaching, if she hasn’t already seen her. She spends most of the game in a panic, wondering what she should say or if she would even get the chance to talk to her.

When she turns back to look at the woman again near the end of the game, Emma cheers for Henry before looking right at  _ her _ , a nostalgic smile on her face that Regina can’t help but return. 

At the end of the game, Henry makes a mad dash for her. “Mom! Did you see me hit that last one? It went  _ so _ far. Maybe my furthest one yet.”

“I saw!” Regina says, crouching to meet him at eye level. Bug tries to lick her nose from beside her when she gets down there, and Henry giggles. “I’m so proud of you. Did you have fun?” 

Henry nods a lot. “We’re going to the picnic, right? For hot dogs?”

“Of course,” Regina smiles. 

The boy opens his mouth like he’s about to ask another question when something behind Regina catches his eye, and instead of saying whatever he’s clearly already forgotten about, he whispers. “Mama, who’s that?”

Regina stands and turns, “Emma,” she says, almost an exhale to a breath she’s been holding for months.

The blonde smiles, her hands stuffed in her pockets. “Hi,” she says, almost sheepishly. Before Regina can say anything else, Bug is jumping on Emma barking excitedly at her, and she grins as she drops to her knees to pet him, letting him lick the side of her face. “Hey, boy. I missed you too,” she laughs until he calms down a bit and then looks over at Henry. She glances up at Regina as if seeking approval to speak to him.

She doesn’t need it, but Regina nods anyway. 

“Hey, kid. You played a great game.”

Henry gives her a shy smile as Regina leads him closer. “Henry, this is Emma. Can you say hi?”

“Hi, Emma!” Henry says. “I’m Henry, and that’s Bug.”

“It’s nice to meet you Henry,” Emma says, letting Henry shake her hand. He giggles but follows through. “I actually know Bug already.”

“Really?” Henry asks. “How?”

“It’s a long story, kid,” Emma laughs. 

Regina watches the two of them interact, and it’s so surreal, she isn’t sure what to say. Her father walks up, and he seems to gather who Emma is without anyone needing to tell him. He introduces himself and they shake hands.

“Thank you so much, Emma, for everything,” he says, his voice so accepting. He gives Regina a smile like he understands more than she’s ever confessed. 

“I have Regina to thank.” Emma says, smiling over at her before looking back to the older man. “You raised an amazing daughter.”

“Dad,” Regina finally speaks. She clears her throat when it doesn’t come out the way she expected it to. “Do you think you can take Bug and Henry over to the picnic? I’ll meet you there…”

He smiles. “Of course. It was lovely to meet you, Emma.” To Regina’s embarrassment, he gives her a sly wink as he takes Henry’s hand to leave. She’s sure Emma didn’t see it, but she definitely sees the blush spreading across her cheeks as the three of them disappear, leaving Emma and Regina standing alone on home plate.

Emma shuffles her feet, and they both watch the dust it creates. Regina looks up first, Emma’s eyes still downcast, and it reminds her of when she saw how the blonde acted around Killian in the hospital, small.

But then Emma looks up at her and smiles, and it’s the woman she knew again, brighter and healthier than the last time. There’s color in her cheeks and her hair glows in the sun, and she’s just-- 

“You look beautiful,” Emma says.

“Me?” Regina laughs. “No, I’m probably all sweaty. I didn’t even put on makeup today.” Emma shrugs like it doesn’t make a difference, her hands returning to her pockets.

“Henry’s cute. He really did a good job. And Bug,” Emma grins. “Is he the mascot?

“Unofficially,” Regina laughs. “He likes being outside a lot, as you can imagine. I hardly have to use a leash on him.”

“I’m sure he appreciates that.”

Regina nods and the two of them fall back into an awkward silence. Regina glances up at Emma, who’s watching her nervously, and Regina is suddenly filled with this need to wrap her arms around the other woman, just to feel her, but she holds back. “How have you been doing? Since…” she trails off, the rest not needing to be said.

“Good,” Emma says, kicking at the dirt again. “My leg recovered, of course, so I’ve been able to go back to work. Though I’ve started taking physical therapy classes. Looking into switching careers, maybe.” 

“It’s funny… I think I’m switching careers too.”

“Oh yeah?”

“Lately I’ve been leaning towards teaching. Focussing on training future surgeons. It’s a lot less pressure, but it also means more regular hours. So I can be here for Henry.”

Emma smiles, “Yeah, I noticed you were coaching. That’s really great.”

“I think he likes it, Bug and I being a part of the team,” Regina smiles at Emma. The blonde shifts a little on her feet, taking her hands out of her pockets to wring them together before putting them right back. “So, how was your wedding?” Emma blinks in surprise. 

“Ah…” Emma clears her throat before shrugging, bringing her hands out of her pockets once again to fiddle with a ring that isn’t there. “We’re not married.”

“You’re not engaged either, I take it…”

Emma shakes her head. “It’s not Killian, it’s… I don’t know,” she sighs. “I don’t know,” she repeats, and the silence comes back.

Regina watches the other woman, avoiding her gaze, and there’s something about having Emma in front of her again that makes Regina feel everything she’s been putting off for the past few months so strongly, something that makes all her efforts at letting go and making space just dissipate. 

She’d tried to tell herself she didn’t love Emma, and she failed so thoroughly.

“It was really hard going home,” Emma says suddenly. “It was hard leaving you there at the hospital and even harder to just keep going like normal, knowing that you wouldn’t be by my side anymore. It was like.. no matter how many people were around me, no matter who it was, I always felt lonely. Like something was missing.” Emma falls silent for a moment before looking up at Regina, finally meeting her gaze. “You never answered my calls.”

“You had Killian…”

Emma scoffs, “No. I didn’t. I still don’t. He’s a good guy, but he can never understand me. Not like you do.” Regina’s breath catches in her throat, but she tries not to react, tries not to look away from Emma’s intense stare. 

The blonde shakes her head, looking away first. “When you didn’t answer me for the first few times, I thought maybe it was a sign that this wasn’t meant to work out, but I never stopped calling.” She glances back up before continuing, “And then, I developed my pictures. I saw the picture you took of me, and I thought  _ that _ was a sign, but… clearly none of it was.”

Emma kind of shrugs before taking a step back. She’s half turned away when Regina reaches for her, her hand on Emma’s bare arm and she feels the goosebumps that form there. Emma turns back to her but doesn’t pull away. Regina drops her arm anyway.

“I think you have a point, you know…. about signs. You could have been on that plane, been crashed with  _ anyone _ , but it wasn’t just anyone… it was me. We loved each other and our passion made us fight harder. We weren’t fighting for our own lives, Emma. We were fighting for each other’s.” She pauses, her eyes closing, trying to fight back the words she knows she needs to say, the words she means more than anything. “I loved you, Emma. I  _ love _ you.”

She’s fighting back tears as she says it, and she can’t tell if Emma is too, but the blonde doesn’t look away from her. “Yeah.” Emma nods once before nodding again. “Yeah, maybe. But you know, the heart is just a muscle.” She doesn’t smile when she says it, but it sounds like a punchline. A repeat of the one thing Regina believed so steadfastly before she met Emma, and the one thing Emma took and tossed right out the window, disproving Regina’s entire way of thinking just by existing.

“You’re right,” Regina agrees, looking away, too afraid that if she looks back at Emma, she’ll fall apart on the spot.

“Regina?” She doesn’t answer, but when she feels Emma’s arms pulling her closer, she can’t help but react, her hands looping around Emma’s waist, her face in the crook of her neck. One of the blonde’s hands tangles into Regina’s hair, and she hears Emma let out a soft sob into Regina’s ear. “You don’t still believe that, do you?”

Regina’s tears break free. “No. How could I after meeting you?” she pulls back to look into teary green eyes. “You changed my whole world, Emma. I don’t remember what my life was like before you were a part of it.”

“I broke up with Killian,” Emma suddenly blurts.

“You did?”

“Yeah,” Emma laughs, wet but happy, and she leans her forehead against Regina’s, both hands resting on the back of Regina’s neck. “Yeah, I did. I couldn’t be who he needed, or who he wanted. Not when I love somebody else.”

Regina pulls her head, back, her eyes wide as she assesses the blonde, her smile bright. “You mean--”

“Of course,” Emma laughs again. “I love you.” Regina beams and Emma says it again, smiling wider as she does, “I love you.”

Regina’s heart is soaring in her chest as she pulls Emma’s body flush against hers and brings their lips together once again.

**Author's Note:**

> tell me all your thoughts!! i worked really hard on this, and i'm extremely excited about it so any feedback would seriously make my life <3


End file.
